.Let's Go Land

A little matter of familiarization

2010-03-25T02:13:00.004+08:00

Naturally I’m as happy as Larry, but with the on-going International Book Fair in which my wifey’s heavily involved in, together with the age-old aching tooth I’ve been battling with till today, our honeymoon period has not been rosy so far.

Since we officially tied the knot, well-wishers frequently asked how marriage life been coming along. For one thing, my damned tooth still hurts like hell that the most noticeable difference is that now I have somebody to hear me moan at night!

Bed time tales aside, - even by default- I can now proudly claim to have a Kampong to call my own. Being a PJ boy my entire life the only hometown I can think of is the jam-packed Subang Jaya.

But not anymore.

A supposedly ‘long’ 2-night customary stay at her parental home back in Kuala Selangor turns out to be the shortest stay ever. All the initial worry at adjusting to a new environment were groundless, because as soon I’m in, I immediately feel its unnecessary to make a rush exit.

No, not up to the extent I feel the sudden urge to just surrender my status as a city dweller, pack all the things up, move up there and lead a laidback lifestyle for good but at least now I get to enjoy the best of both worlds.

It’s not a kampong house per se or I would have difficulty getting in and out of it for obvious reason, but with lush greenery surrounding their cosy bungalow, I know where exactly to retreat to the next time my brain’s in dire need of putting its feet up.

And that’s what I’ll be banking on; some peace of mind, especially with the up-coming project I’m about to embark.

To be frank, writing is never my passion. It’s always a struggle each time I need to come up with a piece. It makes it even worse that reading for me is a once – or at the most twice- a year affair.

Like many other things however, money is the major factor that keeps me in this writing business. It’s the same reason that pushes me to take up this new challenge. In putting it simply, it works like a dangling carrot.

Similar to my new experience of having a sneak peak of what living a kampong life is all about last week, I think I’m up for a bigger test ahead by charting in an unfamiliar territory – writing a book.

I’m game and its all systems go.

For now it is just a little matter of visiting another alien turf – the dental clinic.

Tying down

2010-03-04T01:34:00.002+08:00

I just took a long crap. And if my crap factory decides not to work overtime then that one toilet session could well be my last as a bachelor.

By the time anyone reads this I’d most probably have officially taken the plunge.

Yes, finally the day arrived, and I really could do with a hard pinch on the areola to ensure that, this time around, it is no longer some silly dream but a reality.

Years ago never thought I’d get to live this long, let alone getting hitched.

Life back then was simply meaningless. I mean, what’s the point living when all I was capable of was breathing. Breathing for the sake of prolonging whatever’s left of the remaining life and became a burden to my loved ones? That’s one reality I could do without.

But that’s all behind me because TODAY is the reality.

After years of going through one adversity after another, I can’t wait to just get in there and come out triumphant.

Some people asked how I finally managed to overcome the main hurdle. The trick is to relieve of all the shitload that I have been carried all along, offered some olive branch and in return was given another shot at starting things afresh.

Perhaps all I need now is to defecate more frequently, leave all the crap behind and I’m quite sure this new journey I’m undertaking will smell sweeter as time passes.

Here’s to a greener, cleaner and fresher side of the leaf!

Repeat Offenders

2010-01-20T11:38:00.004+08:00

The stupid dick has retracted his words and apologised.

I’m not sure if this was going to be a lesson especially to the powers-that-be because you wouldn’t want to bet on anything if such uncalled-for remarks will not be repeated by these bunch ever again.

Some people just don’t learn.

And they will never learn. Making fun of Karpal Singh’s disability is as good as insulting the whole disabled community in the country.

The prominent lawyer cum politician in wheelchair may be a figure of controversy and to an extent, hatred, amongst those who don’t share their political ideology with the DAP man but there’s no reason for anyone to be stooping so low just to take a cheap shot at his physical shortcomings.

If it’s political, do us the disabled community a huge favour by sticking to just that- politics.

In this case for a lawyer representing his client in a legal battle, PROFESSIONALISM should be the rule of the day, and not silliness.

Cherry of a New Beginning

2009-12-31T01:19:00.006+08:00

I’m wrapping up...for the year that is.

Hope to be back very soon with more concrete ideas that I can chip in towards the disabled community, an issue like it or not, remains top of my whimpering list.

But first things first, as I need to get my own life sorted out.

Some 10 years ago, when I resigned to the fact that only through a set of wheelchair can determine the black and white of whatever’s left of my remaining life, never really imagined it’d prolong colourfully that now I don’t wish to give up the ghost anytime soon, not at least for another 5-6 decades more.

Before anyone starts having idea this is one of those crappy motivational pieces, it is not because normally my advice to those who always moan how his life sucks to go ahead and snuff it out in the most dramatic way possible.

Personally however, I’ve got so much to live for thanks largely to the decade that’s about to see its curtain fall before us in a few hours time.

It couldn’t have kicked off on the righter foot, when I finally realised it was about time to get off the bed and start learning the trades of getting around on wheelchair. By no means a walk in the park but as I found the groove it didn’t take long before it hits on me there’s actually life ahead that waits.

And so the journey through the decade began, constantly a learning process throughout. Getting back into the society was the toughest hurdle but looking back, it’s not much them but my own weaknesses, the emotional department being the biggest culprit.

That’s all behind me now.

Fast forward to 2009, the final year has at long last provided the elusive break that, to be honest, I’ve been craving for since as far back the day when I first stepped into the wonders of the adolescent years.

Anyway, just as it started, I’m pleased to end the decade on a high.

Similarly, if everything goes to plan (insyaAllah) the new beginning will see the continuation from where it left off, and the New Year will kick off the new dawn on a more positive note.

Only this time with a bang...

By...ehem...

...screwing up.

Young Tigers to the fore

2009-12-15T11:59:00.003+08:00

Watching a football game – this time much closer to home- last nihgt, finally in many many years that I felt our (under 23) national team has the right attitude to land us the elusive SEA Games gold medal that’s been missing from the FAM’s cabinet exactly over two decades ago.

Laos 1 Malaysia 3.

It may be a false hope yet but being a closet fan of the national team’s for a while now, the joy’s too overwhelming to keep my emotions from bursting out.

The fans have waited way too long for somethign encouraging to be produced by the national side.

I remember the last time the gold medal went to us was in 1989, soundly beating our tiny neighbours down south 3 goals to 1. Some of the country’s great players, Lim Tiong Kim, Dollah Salleh, K Rajagopal and to a lesser extent a certain Shebby Singh, they were all part of the team.

Heck even the legendary Zainal Abidin Hassan, with his trademark afro hairdo – that easily beats Marouane Fellaini’s any day – played a crucial role in that year’s SEA games fruitful campaign.

The win was such a great deal to all Malaysians that public holiday was even announced the next day.

Of course I don’t expect another holiday beckons – purely a reason I’m no longer schooling- but with expectations running high, our players must by all means, perform to their utmost best for a better chance of not letting this golden opportunity from slipping away.

So bring on Vietnam.

Our Young Tigers should be up to the challenge, as long they keep their gentel skill to a minimal.

1Malaysia for a much-needed change

2009-12-03T03:00:00.006+08:00

The International Day of Disabled Persons - the same annual day for people with disability which if I remember it correctly went by a different other name last year - is making its round again today. But by any which name the United Nation fancies it, the aim of the Day has been consistent throughout since its inauguration back in the early 90s, that is mainly to promote better understanding on disability issues, rights of the disabled persons and all that same old same old.

In our country the National level do will be held on the 5th, with the Malaysia Association of the Blind getting the honour to host the event this time around, and again my bet is that its gonna be yet another same old same old.

Everything’s foreseeable.

Speeches by the big shots will be filled with long and scripted sweet promises regardless of whether they had the audience all glued. Then everybody applauds and once the shindig’s over its back to square one.

You can’t blame me for sounding bitter but since the celebration last year (and the previous years) even some simple wishes have yet to be fulfilled.

To elaborate will make this piece sound like a broken record. After all Its the usual issues, you know; Transportation, accessibility, job opportunity and all the disparity in seeking the elusive break that is long overdue.

Maybe there’s some improvement in some sense or another, and I am not going to deny it and give people the impression I’m one ungrateful OKU but when progress is at a snail’s pace, and after decades of waiting at that, the older OKU generation may not live to witness the progress they had fought for over the years.

A significant change has to start now. Not December 3 2010 but now.

I don’t know how the ground-breaking work is gonna be like but the much talked-about concept of 1malaysia may just provide the tool to pull us out of the mud.

Our Prime Minister, the man behind the idea has to personally ensure his brand of governance benefits everyone, that even if a single Malaysian soul being left out will the campaign be considered a dud.

Maybe a little too much for an asking but roping in the disabled community in future development blue-prints IS what the concept partly about.

It is after all about acceptance and does not centre on national unity and ethnic tolerance alone, right?

All we’re asking is to be accepted, to feel the sense of belonging and be part of Malaysia’s development, the same development the country has taken our able-bodied counterparts to at a fairly decent pace.

The last time checked the OKU citizens are Malaysians too, hence our entitlement to some piece of the action, and ultimately sharing the cake.

Failing which, the International Day for the Disabled or whatever it is called nowadays will have a similar story year in year out and It’s gonna be like totally un-1Malaysia if that continues.

Dogs: licence to bitch

2009-10-20T13:37:00.003+08:00

Based on all the reports I read the next day, the first ever dog forum organised by MBPJ being held recently was a great success. Even though I didn’t stay until the end, the morning session was enough to convince me to make it a point to attend in future forums.

The highlight of the day was when it was announced by YB Ronnie Liu, the state exco member that the Selangor government will waive the licence fee for the disabled and elderly who wishes to own a dog.

Free dog licence will definitely encourage more people from this group to keep dogs as pet as it is well known they make good companionship.

Being a non-dog owner/lover, the move wouldn’t make any difference but I’m all for anything that’s beneficial to those who are in need.

But apparently not everyone took the announcement well. I was told an officer from the local council feels it’s not necessary to waive the licence charge as the existing fee is relatively cheap, affordable even to the unfortunate groups.

So in other words what this bitch said is to pay the exact amount for the licence like everyone else does if the disabled and elderly want to be treated equally.

To the officer, this is how she cynically defines equal rights, the campaign synonymously advocated by the disabled group.

OH FINALLY. At long last we get to hear someone in the authority council barks around upholding the rights.

The question is why only now? For a mere dog issue finally the definition breaks through their thick skull when equality of rights should be extended to numerous other issues since ages ago.

When the disabled group demanded accessibility to shop houses, unscrupulous developers still get the green light to operate the building by the same bunch of authority.

When we asked for wheelchair-friendly curbs on roadsides, it took them ages to approve only a stretch.

When we constantly brought forward our decades-old transport woe, only one van is provided to cater to thousands disabled PJ residents.

And our endless woe keeps piling up...

Yet when it comes to dog licence suddenly their version of equal rights takes into effect.

For a few hundred bucks she’s denying a little privilege the not-so-fortunate group hopes to be able to enjoy.

If there’s any left, her rationality to oppose such a good cause is that her employer will go bust for giving free dog licence.

Imagine that. MAJLIS PERBANDARAN TEMPATAN MUFLIS GARA-GARA LESEN ANJING, and PJ will be left without any local council to man the district.

But come to think of it, not that it makes much difference anyway.

Dogs & Bitches: Pets or Pests?

2009-10-08T13:13:00.011+08:00

During my childhood days, walking past a particular neighbour’s house had always been a dread as more often than not I’ll end up running for dear life with the irresponsible owner’s pet dogs hot my trail.

Ok they may be a pair of Shih Tzus, but the thought of being eaten alive by these midget mutts was enough reason for me to take a longer route home from school daily.

Back then it was quite common for kids my age, especially the Muslim kids, to fear them. Some would run a million miles by a mere sight of the animal...even from a million miles away.

In our tiny mind if we are bitten, the thought that we are ritually unclean will haunt us for the rest of the day.

Naturally I loathed them, and felt those neighbourhood canines ought to be captured and sold to the mobile satay vendor who plies his trade from house door to door.

But decades have passed. And my perception towards the animal have since changed.

To a certain extent, I have yet to conquer the fear, and it still pretty much dogs me. However, long gone the days when I thought they’re nothing but a racist animal with appetite only for flesh of a Muslim boy.

Throughout the years, I learned that apart from it being an intelligent animal, dogs make great companionship. And due to their helpful nature, certain breeds are considered god sent to the disabled community. They are known to fetch items that are beyond reach especially for those with physical limitations and serves as an eye for the visually-impaired.

No, I don’t intend to own one for obvious reason but I make no bones about people keeping dogs as pets, as long they do it responsibly.

But do they all?

So in commemorating with the World Animal Day, a first ever dog forum organised by MBPJ will be held this Sunday to discuss on this very topic.

Besides lending my support to a dear buddy, I’ll be there yet for another attempt at overcoming one of my childhood’s worst nightmares, which now I’m beginning to believe to be a bit unfounded.

An evening with Dato'

2009-10-01T04:28:00.004+08:00

So there was a powerful earthquake taken place yesterday. It was felt by many especially those who either live in high-rise condos or working/surfing porn in their office cubicles on top of the sky scrapers scattered around town.

I belong in the first category. But I didn’t realise there was actually an earthquake until all the residents were told to evacuate our respective units.

And I was like, hey what’s going on, before went in again to fetch my Ramones’ Box-set CDs. I mean, if the buildings were to come crushing down, at least I can still claim to be a proud owner of a rare music album.

This evacuation exercise thing was a new experience to me. With all the residents taking their own sweet time evacuating clad in home attire (boxers, kaftans, sarongs), I thought the scene was like there was a huge orgy party going on.

But of course, a party is not complete without a clown.

Appeared out of the crowd was this bloke in his chequered pyjamas, cracking recycled joke that the earthquake should happen more often as so the residents can mingle around regularly and stuff.

And I went like, sure Mr Krusty.

The thing is, I don’t mind the used joke as his ice-breaker but what’s pathetic was he actually introduced himself as Dato, and his (young) wife, datin.

Firstly, what’s with the bright orange-coloured pyjamas la Dato? Secondly, stop being so formal because thirdly, we ARE living in a close-knit community – as apparently this fella was not aware of - naturally we address each other by our names.

If there’s someone who needs to socialise regularly it is our resident dato. Instead of cooped up with his (young) missus all the time, make an effort to read the condo’s notice board and join one or two of the residents’ many activities.

That way if there’s another earthquake occurrence (Nauzubillah), we can keep it completely informal. After all, its just an evacuation exercise, not a real orgy.

Aidilfitri

2009-09-18T22:42:00.003+08:00

Here’s wishing you dudes/dudettes Salam Aidilfitri, ampun maaf dipinta ikhlas dari saya.

Zero-zero, folks!

one for the guys

2009-09-15T23:07:00.005+08:00

I accepted a job which I thought was lemon squeezy but after a glimpse of it I thought shiiiiiiiit...instantly I know a mountain of a task awaits me ahead.

So instead of getting straight down to it I procrastinated, and went wandering around the net and You-tubing for hours.

While at it I came across this video below which I find its groovy rhythm rather, how shall i put it...'interesting'?.

First time listening yet the sound was so familiar.

The intro especially should immediately hit the chord amongst the guys (and some women).

Kih kih...

Ok, gotta get back to work. But not before another round of Back and Forth...need to learn getting into the rhythm real quick...muahahahaha...

I am a Malaysian

2009-09-11T03:17:00.007+08:00

Its simply not coming. All I have in mind right now is taking a swipe at my own race, and it has been playing in my head since a few days before our beloved nation celebrated her 52nd Merdeka anniversary.

But of course I wont be putting my thoughts into print. All I can tell you is that my take on the recent cow-head circus is downright insensitive and controversial.

To a certain quarters my thoughts can be misconstrued. They’ll think I’m worse than Sol Campbell (Judas!) or something along that line, or even risk getting charged with sedition.

Everyone knows I’m not really in celebratory mood lately, but no way me is spending my Syawal in Perak.

Ok maybe not everyone but someone actually noticed and texted to ask why I didn’t do any Merdeka post like it has traditionally been in previous years.

I gave this year’s a miss only for one reason; intolerance.

An act of bigotry is the worst thing that could ever happen in a multi-racial country. Such appalling gesture is not reflective of what our Malaysia is supposed to be. After long achieving independence are we truly what we’ve always claimed to be, as asserted proudly on travel brochure and Merdeka-themed ads particularly?

Every August for the past decades now we’ve been fed with commercials promoting racial harmony. In fact many of us look forward to re-run ads by a certain dead genius. Regrettably many of us too did not get the message these ad geniuses tried to get it across.

It means shit to them. In the name of politics they’d stoop the lowest possible just to score points and shoot down their political rival in the process.

Sure, once a racist you’re forever a pig but partly I’m blaming politics for all the major fracas that’s been in the limelight in recent months.

If there’s one thing that is capable of ruining our beloved Malaysia, its politics.

Or the worst kind, race politics. As proud I am of my roots, me having none of it when racism kicks in. I love my country dearly it hurts to see it being ridiculed by these dirty people. The dirty game must stop or Malaysia will come crushing down sooner than we may think.

I pray to God if that ever to happen, let it not be during my lifetime at least. But once I’ve kicked the bucket then ok, they can go crazy, as I’d rather be dead than to be part of a disgraceful kind with absolute power tightening their grips over a wrecked nation.

But the damage is fixable. The tools are in their hand and time is pretty much on their side to rectify it.

I mean, its not too late, right?

Game plan

2009-08-28T02:38:00.005+08:00

I’m at a crossroads.

I’ve been invited to try out Boccia (pronounced BOCH-a) - a lawn bowl version for athletes with disability- by the game’s top official, and insisted I give it a shot because she wanted me to be in the team so much.

But after witnessing a few times how the game is played, I find it a little too unexciting for my liking.

I can always say no but here’s the tricky part; if I made the team, its not for Rumah Hijau or some shit but the National’s, no less. Its my only chance ever to represent the country, even if its just Boccia.

And the most tempting factor is the competitions the team will be involved in, beginning with Asia Paragames next year, which will be held in Tokyo.

Yes, this is Japan we’re talking about man, J-E-P-U-N, Japan!

Japan has always been my dream destination. Its not just about the upskirt but its rich tradition and culture that attracts me the most.

So if I can get over the game’s dullness, I might stand a chance of getting a free ride all the way up there, courtesy of MSN and you folks (Taxpayers), and enjoy the trip.

I think I’m going ahead with it. For Japan’s sake, I believe I can handle all the monotonous training routine, the second step towards seeing my dream of setting my wheels on the sun rising land materialised.

The first step is of course to take up the offer and learn all about the game’s trade as soon as possible.

But then again...maybe after Raya.

Salam Ramadhan

2009-08-21T23:23:00.004+08:00

Ramadhan is back.

Here’s wishing all Muslims Selamat berpuasa. May Allah give us the strength to go through each day, for the next one month with ease. And to all my non-muslim friends, well, happy loading.

Time to have my first sahur of the month. No, wait. Make that supper as I’ve got roti canai still to stuff in later in the morning...I mean, before Imsak breaks, of course...Muahahahaha...

Sharing the common voice

2009-08-19T02:03:00.003+08:00

On Wheel Power recently, by Anthony Thanasayan.

'I RECEIVED an interesting e-mail from a new friend I made recently. Daniel Ahmad Sharani who lives in Petaling Jaya, writes: “People often ask me if I was born a quadriplegic. The answer to that question is no,” says Daniel, and went on to explain a little bit about his background.

For full article, go HERE.

Someone sent me an email in response to the article. She felt both Anthony and I would make an explosive combo and ought to work closely together at ironing out disability issues. Of course from my part, I find the suggestion rather flattering.

In truth both of us have in fact, discussed on the possibility of merging our ideas and work out on things that can be beneficial to the community.

I think that’s mainly the reason why we hit it off very well when we first met. Since the first time I bumped into his column a decade ago, can’t remember if I had ever opposed to any of his views.

Its about looking at the bigger picture. If a certain issue benefits the unfortunate in general, then you can count on me for the support. I totally dig anyone who promotes positive changes. From our living environment, to creating awareness amongst the public, we know darn well Wheel Power is all about that.

So basically both of us shares a common goal.

Now, before anyone starts having silly idea I’m curry favouring Anthony (now that he’s somebody in MBPJ) with hopes of getting something in return, I admit you are not too far off. Apart from both of us sharing the common wish of living in a barrier-free environment, he is in the position to make that change, beginning with my area part of the town.

So I thought maybe...just maybe, a little back-rub might do the trick!

Whatever it is, I don’t get paid for having full praise of him. For all the effort he’s put into for over 2 decades, he rightly deserves it.

They are not any better

2009-08-07T02:41:00.006+08:00

Here’s a scene I managed to catch on one of the foodie shows produced by our little neighbour down south;

Three ladies -one's pregnant- just had scrumptious desserts and was on their way out when the pregnant lady reminded her friends to NOT assist her descending some flight of steps because get this, in her own words, “I’m not a handicapped, mind you!”

I always hear good things about Singapore. From OKUs perspective in particular, the country’s disabled community are well taken care of and a subject of envy to most of their counterparts in the region.

But that statement above proves no matter how advanced the disabled have progressed, general perception still stigmatises people with physical shortcoming. Its simply like, you’re a cripple on wheelchair, so even if you’re as healthy as an ox from the public eye you’re sick and in constant need of a help.

That’s a familiar story happening in our own backyard by the way.

Its not always we get to take a swipe at our southern neighbours because admittedly, they are superior to us in many ways.

But while I’m at it, let’s kick on the gash and further damage their dented ego.

Their national football team sucks!

Hell YES. Sucks as in, appalling. If there’s any other accurate term to describe it, its MACC.

The 5-0 drubbing by an English club side some weeks back suggested the national team are in dire need of a total revamp. Sure they can argue it was the mighty (under-strength) Liverpool they were up against but if it is news to them, our young Tigers did fairly well against a full-strength English champs!

Yes, it feels good to have a go at them, especially to be backed with facts and not just emotion alone.

Finally after a long while it reinforces my belief they are not any better than us in some ways.

Now I wonder what will happen if the two national sides take it to the field. I definitely have some good feelings about it.

A local council for all

2009-07-23T21:32:00.006+08:00

Excerpts taken from Anthony Thanasayan’s Wheel Power today;

“He was surprised that some able-bodied people had objected to the disabled-friendly project by MBPJ.”

“The blind were rather tickled by the objection of some sighted people who thought that the project should have been done at another place where a popular eye hospital is.”

Check out the complete article Here. Mr Thanasayan was kind enough to even mention my name there.

So anyway, naturally after getting my parents to read the article, we discussed on the issue at length. And we came to conclusions that those who criticised the project are either downright selfish or that none of their family members are disabled, hence, their lack of sense of empathy.

As we have stressed on it for the zillionth times, this said project –a stretch of pavement- is universally designed, which means it can be used by EVERYONE.

Let me spell it out in case these people still didn’t get it. E-V-E-R-Y-O-N-E. And that includes you able-bodied morons who thinks the pavement reconstruction is a waste of money.

Or the taxpayer’s money to be more precise.

Well, fuck that. All of us pay our taxes too. Our dads, our brothers, sisters, wives, mistresses...they’re all taxpayers.

If this selfish-bunch thinks they have their say, then please keep in mind that WE too, in the disabled community have our rights to uphold.

And like it or not here’s something to add up to your misery; we are here to stay because the good people at MBPJ have a few more disabled-friendly projects on the pipeline!

So be afraid...wooooo...

Ok seriously, If it is too hard for you to be with us, than be prepared to come up with better reasons to back up your rationale behind such hostility.

But don’t be too naive to think the disabled will throw in our towels and wheel home crying to our moms (and mistresses).

We’ve waited for such goodies to come our way for ages that we must be out of our mind to back off now. I mean, finally at least one PBT is doing it right.

As Anthony aptly puts it, the disabled community is glad that MBPJ is going on a right direction with its forward-thinking plans for all its residents.

And when he said ALL, you better believe it because for one, a politician he is not.

So long, Good Ol' Captain!

2009-07-19T23:28:00.005+08:00

Capt Yusof Ahmad (1947-2009)

I woke up this afternoon only to be greeted by shocking news.

‘Capt Yusof Ahmad, aka The Ancient Mariner, died in his sleep last nite’, as the message went. Immediately I thought it could be a mistake, as only a week ago the good ol’ Capt and his family had lost his beloved mom.

Then another message came in to confirm the sad news.

When I first started I remember ANCIENT MARINER being one of very few blogs highly recommended by everyone. They were spot-on. His blog has been in Let’s Go Land’s link list ever since.

We met regularly later on through events and even bumped into each other a few times around the neighbourhood. He was approachable and had parted a good advice during one of our meetings that I will forever remember it for the rest of my life.

His demise will be a great loss to all of us in the blogging fraternity. The Good Ol' Captain will sorely be missed.

Bon voyage, sir.

Al-Fatihah.

Pondering over pathway

2009-07-17T02:36:00.002+08:00

Here’s a quickie.

Earlier today I was somewhere in PJ, wheeling alongside the who’s who in the disabled community to protest against, get this, a group of able-bodied residents who had conveniently objected the local council’s decision to create a more disabled-friendly environment around the township.

For the record, the PBT had reconstructed a stretch of pavement and made it functional for everyone, and that includes not just the disabled but as well the able-bodied themselves.

Tell me if I’m missing out something here but when this project works in every single resident’s favour, I fail to see why the need for some quarters to bark about unnecessarily.

Like it or not, this is what equal rights is all about. When all this while most pavements shut wheelchair-users from accessing on it, the new universally-designed footpath caters to both sets of users.

So what’s the fuss really about? They get to still set their foot on the pavement and equally so are our wheels.

Not that the pavement was designed to make life a living mayhem for the jaywalkers, no.

So until that actually happen I sincerely suggest these people to quit being a selfish bastard and shut their pie-hole for once.

And with that said, I’ll be off again.

Salam mesra.

Shoot and win

2009-06-30T21:51:00.012+08:00

I’m sure we’ve all seen one of those warning signboard that says ‘Trespassers Will Be Shot’ noticeably hung on fences of a private property somewhere. Now I wish similar punishment could also be applied to those inconsiderate car owners who have no qualms at abusing disabled parking spots.

The problem has always been to catch these bastards red-handed.

Its never easy I tell you that, and it doesn’t help when you have kayu security guards sleeping on their job.

Last week however my break came and it was one those rare occasions I get to exercise my rights, telling the driver straight in the face.

Here’s the thing. The wheelchair-designated parking spots in this one hypermarket we usually frequent were never vacant. But regardless of whether the driver’s a cripple does not matter because I can’t simply be jumping the gun and started shitting on his car hood.

But as luck would have it that day, one of the parking spots was available only to be beaten to it by a car in front of us. And sure enough, not 1 but 3 able-bodied African dudes coolly alighted the car and walks away as if their Tok Wan owns the supermarket.

Then bang! it happened. I shot ‘em 3 goons with my trusted Tommy gun, hitting them right on the forehead and rejoiced the moment all 3 hit the ground...

...Ok seriously, here's what actually happened.

I got down and yelled out at the driver to remove his junk somewhere.

Oh oh...but get this- he had the cheek to believe he was innocent and had not violated any law even with a huge OKU signboard clearly erected in front of his vehicle.

I mean, duuuuude...if you really are visually impaired then by all means man, the fucking space is all yours.

But no, some people just had to argue even when they realise they don’t stand a chance. Hard as they try, the not-so-good will always triumph over evil.

The driver especially, stood there with two minds after I made it clear he can either go on shopping and risk getting his car clamped or does the right thing by vacating the parking space.

Maybe the thought of the yellow clamping thing made him do the right thing and spared any damages from being done.

Except for bruised ego. I mean, cool homeys don’t get no rap from no crip on wheels, know what I’m sayin’?

Hey, I was merely exercising my rights. What’s equally important is this episode should at least instil some sense of awareness to those involved and witnessed it.

Its about time society jacks their level of awareness a notch up.

And a harsher punishment similar to the trespassing law should effectively do the trick.

Impractical term

2009-06-15T14:01:00.003+08:00

KEMAMAN, June 13 — People with a disability should not be referred to as “disabled” but rather “People with Special Ability” as that would best fit their description said Youth and Sports Minister Datuk Ahmad Shabery Cheek.

Thoughtful indeed, but I can help to think it’s purely sugar coating. If he was trying to score points with the disabled community, the minister is definitely shooting blanks.

What’s in a name you tell me. Unless a disabled person on wheelchair possesses a super special ability to overcome insurmountable environmental barriers or get to ride on a wheelchair-unfriendly public bus, a shit by any other name would smell as bad.

That’s the stinking reality. The struggle we have to put up with in order to lead a normal and meaningful life like our able-bodied counterparts IS the reality, and this is the area where the powers-that-be should put some extra effort into.

Everybody’s capable of coining with phrases. And in this case to come up with the most politically correct term usable will not provide us an inch of progress. If there’s a need to change, the word special should be replaced with beneficial instead.

Personally I don’t mind the rudest expression one could think of as long practical changes are made.

So until the government comes up with something beneficial, I’m sticking with the commonly-used term, the disabled person.

Or crips, or cacat...whatever.

Back and banging

2009-06-11T11:01:00.004+08:00

Hey I’m back, back with a BANG.

It could have been sooner but when I was supposed to scout around for a new laptop, I splashed a chunk of the allocated budget on a gun instead.

Yes, a pistol, a Beretta 92 to be precise.

It was unnecessary and all the blabla, I know. Got that a lot and the flaks haven’t ceased since the day the gun was purchased.

But I’m going ahead and keep it. Its meant for protection after all. Just like a condom y’know, only safer.

I mean, you just never know. A cold-blooded murderer might just strike while you’re bumping uglies with your spouse.

So protect yourself and your loved one. The best form of safe sex is always...to carry a weapon.

Anyways, after two sans internet weeks, I thought I had loads to catch up on. So I scoured through all the news available online and read as much as I could.

Then I caught this one piece and then again I thought hey, I didn’t miss much after all. Apparently some things never change.

For being a menace to the Malaysian society, the Mat Rempits continue to enjoy special treatment from the authority. This time around a whopping RM4 mil will be spent to cater to this group’s need for speed by building a circuit, courtesy of public fund, via the clever Terengganu state government of course.

And those who excel get this; will get a sponsorship to race in the International circuit. So instead of getting the law to go down hard on them, they get to travel abroad and see the world.

It just doesn’t sound right at all. I mean, while we still hear cases where the OKUs are being oppressed and punished for enjoying little things we have in life, the Mat Rempits on the other hand gets to travel to places that most Malaysian could only dream of setting their foot in.

It makes one wonder why bother wasting their precious second passing the amended, stricter law in the first place if they’re not going to apply it.

Now, if only these road fiends were the reptilian kind, I’d take the law into my own hands and go on a shooting spree.

Gone begging

2009-06-03T00:57:00.004+08:00

Komputer rosak. And it is beyond redemption.

After years of faithfully providing good service to its max, my 7 year old laptop has decided to call it quits. And the timing couldn’t get any worse possible. I’m broke, which of course is not a surprise but just as I thought of saving up (ehem, ehem...), this latest series of misfortune most likely means I have to break the bank instead.

Hopefully it wont be too long till I get a new replacement. A day without internet can be a real dread.

life’s been ugly enough since I lost my favourite brown Irish hat. And I wouldn’t want to pile up the misery by becoming a public outcast without an internet access for too long.

In the mean time I’ll be gone temporarily. For those with a big heart who wishes to chip in a coupla thousand bucks (Amal Jariah), you can reach me on my cell phone or landline; both numbers can be retrieved from most owners of the blogs listed on the sidebar. Thank you.

Till whenever dudes/dudettes, chai chien!

Flushing down a flattering myth

2009-05-25T11:09:00.009+08:00

Heyy, finally I’m on Facebook. Add me or I’ll C4 you into pieces and eat your children.

Last night I received two emails. It was such a great deal to me because for a change, none of the two were the usual emails with work/porn materials attached to it.

The first one particularly was interesting. An old chum took the trouble to drop in a few lines to ask how I’ve been keeping up. That was a rarity as far as I’m concerned because I can’t even remember the last time someone emailed just to find out about my well-being. What's even more amazing is how the email was constructed- very formal, almost traditional letter-like that the email actually kicked off with the classic Ke hadapan saudaraku Ahmad blabla…

This chap’s a real dying breed I’m telling you.

The sender of the second one was more concerned on the lack of new postings in here. And get this- he went on to say that I should be able to update regularly now that I’ve become a "full-fledged journalist".

Somehow that didn’t come as a surprise. This was like the thousandth times I heard of such claim.

Maybe it was due to my stint as a columnist (and a terrible one at that) that suggested I was a journalist by profession.

So let’s debunk this myth once and for all.

First and foremost, a columnist may not necessarily go into journalism, and vice versa.

Secondly, mixing around with the press people does not make one a journalist. Just like if you fancied the 'Barcodes' to pull through doesn’t necessarily mean you’re a sad Geordie, right?

Right?

Ok that didn't really make sense so let's move on swiftly to the third point.

Most of them journalists -regardless from which angle one looks at it- are capable of writing good piece day in day out, and I don’t even come close to sharing the same league.

Of course I’m fully aware of that. I know where I ‘stand’ exactly and I don’t need a second reminder.

So please keep in mind- I'm a small-time blogger and definitely not a fucking journo-blogger.

As much I’d love to land a job with any one of the rags (reason solely being financial), I just don’t have what it takes to be one. Its never easy because for one thing, a good academic background is required. And all I have is shit. Tertiary education is alien to me.

Besides, an OKU needs to keep up to his billing as an unfortunate and stupid kind in order to live off YOUR money, via one of the government’s schemes.

Regular updates will only make me look intelligent and risk losing the privileges provided.

In the mean time, I’ll post as and when I feel like it. So it’d do me a huge favour to quit acting like a monkey and get your protruding hindquarters off my back.

Thank you.

Crazy over Power

2009-05-15T02:37:00.008+08:00

1. The power tussle looks set to prolong.

2. Even if Mr Mahatma Mandela & Co. manages to recapture the legislative power through vote of no confidence, and the other side accepts the decision lying down, the former still have the Rakyat to face and convince.

3. The power grab already did enough damage to the power grabbing coalition that even if it was done within the constitution, it is generally perceived that whatever took place some three months back was done through undemocratic process.

4. Its going to be quite a task for Mahatma & Co. to convince the masses their party still believe in People’s Power, especially by the manner they took office back in February.

5. Unless fresh election is in the offing, the rakyat will have to live under weak government with thin majority until the next General Election.

6. Economic power is what the people are yearning for. Only a powerful government can provide and feed our cravings for a greater economic growth and productivity.

7. In a democratic country, the power should always belong to the people, and must not be in any power-crazy politician’s hand.

8. I am not a politician, but as part of the people, I consider myself as Power-crazy.

9. For the past months, I’ve been feeding my craze for Power on Fridays, every single week without miss.

10. Since today is Friday, its time for the weekly ritual. It has been a week since I last recharged my power that the feelings of weakness and hunger have kicked in.

11. Must…have…my…weekly…(two) plate(s)…of…

BAWAL POWER!!!

Set nasik, ulaman & sambal belacan bersama Ikan Bawal, Ikan Keli atau Ayam digoreng panas-panas…

Bawal Power is located at
Selera Central, Central Park, Sunway Damansara, Kota Damansara, Petaling Jaya.

12. That’s right, gormandisers! If you're hungry for Power, drive down to Kota Damansara for the real deal succulent Bawal. Memang Power!

Its over, no point living

2009-05-06T12:13:00.002+08:00

My heart’s wrecked. I was too distraught this morning that I skipped my brunch.

Don’t tell me its not the end of the world and all that crazy bullshit, because according to my world, it is.

I think that’s where I’ll be for now; my own world. Nothing beats the comfort and warmth of your own room when you need to be all to yourself (like wanking for example), totally shut from the outside world.

Its crazy out there, I’m telling you. In this current state of mind, I feel as though everyone out there is insane. Its like they’re eager to get me, throwing jabs to where it hurts most and continue pounding till the old wound starts to bleed again.

So its best to just throw myself into an incarceration and treat this wounded heart with some Ubat Kuning.

Until its fully healed, I’ll be blowing bubbles in the land of make believe (e.g Hefner’s Mansion West)- my room.

For any urgent matter, you know where to reach me.

To those rich politician bastards who wish to do some charity and donate a huge chunk of their ill-gotten loose change, I can be reached via email. You can find it somewhere in the profile section.

Till whenever, happy whatever, guys/gals. Or whoever.

Shape up or get lost

2009-04-23T10:23:00.007+08:00

To be quite frank, I’m getting a bit tired of highlighting issues concerning the disabled community. It seems that nobody actually gives a shit.

Forget about the ministry, even those who proclaimed to be championing the OKU rights are guilty of not putting their words preached to where it matters.

But its ok, save yourself the trouble to come up with any excuses, the message is crystal clear- disability issue lacks sensationalism.

Ask people in the broadsheet business what’s boringly repetitive more than any opening speech in a government function. Even they will struggle to come up with an affirmative answer because they too, couldn’t give two hoots about it.

So you cant really blame the society. Issues brought up are basically the same old predicament that can be traced as far back as one thousand decades ago. To put it simply, nobody listens to broken record.

Then we have the really clever officers at JKM, the department that supposedly takes care of our well being since the beginning of human existence.

They are competent, alright. Time and energy are well spent hunting down disabled people subscribing to a freaking Astro.

For goodness sake, fine, we’ll skip the monetary aid. By all means the ministry can use all the money allocated from the country’s recent mini budget as long it is used to completely revamp the entire JKM body. The whole institution stinks and in dire need of a total facelift. Getting rid of the deadwoods would be a good start and down right necessary.

However I don’t expect the minister responsible, DS Sharizat Jalil to clean up the whole mess overnight. But I do hope she’ll make it right this time around, and all ears.

This second stint at the helm should cut the workload tasked on her into halve. Cliché as it may sound but she’s really got to shape things up.

I mean, second time failure can always put serious dent on one’s reputation, right?

Sorry DS Sharizat, never meant to scare you but now that the big boss has laid his wishes down, time is very much against you.

Performance has to be now.

Proud to be a G

2009-04-20T03:03:00.005+08:00

So I had a miserable weekend. And as anticipated, the moment the final whistle blows, unwelcome text messages poured in from rival fans. Their intention was of course, to pile in more misery and nothing more.

This season alone I’ve lost count of the heartache I had to endure. If witnessing your team came out second best isn’t excruciating enough, you have asshole friends who are more than happy to stab a few more daggers up your already wounded heart.

Still, I’m proud to be a G.

But unlike always when I took every defeat in stride like real man usually does, this time I decided to try the method that chics normally go for when sorrow comes a knocking- shopping.

That’s right, Gs.

When you can’t think straight, you go have a ball and do something as therapeutic as shopping for clothes. After all Gunther, ehem…closets are meant for just that, clothes!

Kahkahhh…

Get it? Get it?

God I am so proud to be a G.

The G by the way, stands for Guy- forget about designer labels and Hawaiian shirt, I splashed a good hundred on a very manly (ehem ehem) imported black T with a Rancid-Let’s Go design proudly emblazoned across it.

And of course, G also stands for the Gunners.

I’m a Gooner through and through, and I am so Goddamn proud of that!
.

Back to resuscitate?

2009-04-10T01:29:00.010+08:00

She’s back.

The new cabinet line-up named earlier today saw Datuk Sharizat Jalil, the newly elected Wanita Chief back in ministerial business, taking over the Women, Family and Development portfolio, in which she’s not unfamiliar with.

It will be interesting to see how Sharizat perform this time around after being given another shot at proving her worth.

During her predecessor’s (and successor) time, Datuk Ng Yen Yen’s contribution towards the disabled community wasn’t something she can be proud of. Her decision to upgrade the JKM from the RM200 million allocated especially was a bad call. It should by right, channelled directly to the community as in these trying times every crips in the country could do very much with extra cash in hand.

Sharizat’s (re)appointment has renewed some hopes (at least to me). Najib’s agenda of ‘People First, Performance Now’ should be heeded by the new Madame minister if she wishes to kick it off with a good report card to gloat about.

For a start, she can look into the community’s age-old woe concerning the Disabled Working Allowance (EPC) and consider a 100% increment because apart from the economic slump, jacking it up is long overdue.

Re-branding the JKM is not urgently necessary. The exercise can always wait.

Stormy weekend

2009-04-06T18:37:00.003+08:00

From a Tifosi’s point of view, the Sepang race was another letdown because the team have yet to chalk a single point after two races into this season’s F1 calendar.

But screw the unfavourable result; the experience of sitting literally next to the track tops the whole shebang.

While on our back, escorted by ehem ehem all the way to the city I told Mr MuteAudio, my driver of the day, that bragging about it was compulsory.

But I think I’ll spare you losers the details of the VIP treatment we received throughout. Suffice to say the organisers did an extremely good job.

And my initial worry of inaccessibility was unfounded. SIC, being the venue for international events is indeed, wheelchair-friendly.

Thanks to Celcom to have made it happen. I’d love to get one of those superb Storm BlackBerrys, but that may require me to break the bank, and end up living on a tight budget for the next, err… two years.

Pic stolen from Tony

Revving up

2009-04-04T21:45:00.003+08:00

The F1 circus is in town yet again!

It will be interesting to see how Ferrari and McLaren, the two big guns fair this time around after a disastrous outing last week, that surprisingly saw the new team, Brawn GP conquering the top 2 podiums.

Also, it’d be equally interesting to see if the venue is wheelchair-accessible, and how the organisers will handle a fussy fellow on wheelchair tomorrow because yours truly will be there and all revved up to witness his first ever F1 race right before his eyes.

That’s right man, thanks to Celcom, I am so gonna be there.

So Grid Girls here I…

I mean, Kimi and Felipe here I come!

Gardening pt III

2009-04-03T13:29:00.003+08:00

Sooooooooo…they've made it official.

Malaysians are now officially living in the new era, with a new chief captaining the ship.

We have just witnessed the swearing-in of our country’s sixth Prime Minister, Dato Seri Najib Tun Razak this morning.

Not by any measure however, will the new Perdana Menteri get to smell the fresh flowers surrounding Sri Perdana as he’s got one hell of a colossal task ahead of him. So be very afraid DS. Wooooo...

Well anyway, all the best to you, man.

Meanwhile, his predecessor can now continue his siesta, this time in peace.

Melayu lagi...dan Lain2

2009-04-02T11:15:00.001+08:00

So the political slugfest is pretty much in the thick of action. Knowing our country, not that it has ever taken any break anyway. But the bouts have become official now after the nomination day last week, more the reason for both rivals to kick it up a notch.

Then broken record starts spinning and the usual shit commences.

Well…

Errm…

Err…

Stupid goons, give us something fresh la guys!

I read somewhere the battle for 2 of the seats up for grab will be determined by whoever’s better at enticing the hearts of Malay voters.

But what if they’ve made up their mind? Then too bad la, they’ve got only themselves to kick because politicians should look into people’s plight all the time, and not just during campaigning period.

But all is not quite lost. Since there’s every possibility another by-election will take place before the current term ends, they can start now by tackling the Malay mind not just in one or two constituencies but the whole country.

Buy a slot in between Akademi Fantasia concert because get this; that’s where the mind of the Malays is glued to on Saturday nights. You don’t trust me, take a drive around the Malay-populated area during primetime Saturday night, and it will be as empty as election promises itself.

Of course votes from other races play a vital role too.

Unfortunately the same approach is impractical to the Chinese community. They’re virtually everywhere. If you’re stuck in traffic congestion for instance, try kissing the bumper in front and chances are you just hit a certain Mr Wong’s car.

Get what I mean?

But don’t worry about the Indians. It’s the easiest of task, just head over to Bangsar.

Melayu Global

2009-03-27T11:29:00.003+08:00

Almost everyone I met or spoke over the phone late last night said they were in front of the tv earlier on, sitting right through the assembly till the results were announced.

Hey…good for them.

I on the other hand, was pretty much in my own world, with the tele completely turned off. It was like, I was rehearsing for the Earth Hour thing.

Ok maybe not exactly that as I had my laptop on.

So I completely stayed away from the amno assembly. But not in any ways that made me less of a malay, mind you. In fact, I did something that justifies my Malay-ness, even more Malay than many of those present at PWTC - by drooling over a newly discovered porn site.

Talking about the Earth Hour, which the whole world will observe this Saturday, I didn’t really give a shit about the whole fuss until recently. I think it’s a great idea because I feel most of us are guilty of not conserving the earth energy as much we could, or should

But lately I’ve been more sensitive towards our mother nature, by keeping the damage at bay. Like for instance the Go Green Campaign some time back, I actually did my part and went green myself- by going organic.

So come Saturday, March 28 at 830 pm, I’m playing my bit yet again, by turning all the switches off for 1 hour. Its not really a difficult thing to participate in this rare world event y'know, and ultimately chip in to a good cause because errm…well…

There’s no footie match worth watching!

Ministry to the rescue...NOT!

2009-03-17T12:02:00.006+08:00

From what I gathered, the Second Stimulus Package tabled recently was due partly to ease off some weight off of the people’s shoulder during the economic slump. Although many I came across were rather sceptical about getting some piece of the cake, I as usual, remained positive that some of the good shit would be heading my way.

That is of course, until I found this report while googling for some morphine-related materials.

RM200 Million Will Be Used To Upgrade JKM - Ng Yen Yen

By: Ramjit

KUALA LUMPUR, March 12 (Bernama) -- The RM200 million the Women, Family and Community Development Ministry will get from the Second Economic Stimulus Package will be used to upgrade the Welfare Department (JKM) and hire more staff, said its minister Datuk Seri Dr Ng Yen Yen.She said JKM offices nationwide would be upgraded to be more people and disabled-friendly, which would involve a cost of RM45 million.

"The ministry will also give more attention to old folks homes, especially in Sabah and Sarawak," she told a press conference at the pre-launch of the Purple Ribbon Movement, which will officially launched at the Sunway Resort in Petaling Jaya on March 21.

Ng said RM10 million would be set aside to purchase four-wheel-drive vehicles to facilitate JKM's services for old folks in rural areas while another RM10 million would be spent for hiring new staff to beef up JKM's work force.
BERNAMA

At least a huge chunk of the 200million bucks allocated will be used to upgrade JKM offices across the country to make it more people and disabled friendly.

As always, real clever decision la coming from these people. Instead of channelling the money directly to those who are badly affected, they set their priority on matters that the community could do without particularly in these trying times. And the fact that this is the agency responsible minding the welfare of the disabled community amongst others, for decades they couldn’t even provide basic disabled-friendly facility at their premises. Malu la bro…

Whatever it is, the move by the ministry has certainly raised issues that demand quick clarifications.

Don’t get me wrong, I am all for better quality service especially when the cause benefits the less fortunate. But for now, pressing matters like imminent financial shortage hitting the community’s wallets should be on top of their list. Increments on existing allowances under their various schemes deserve utmost priority.

We are in financial crisis, any renovations can take the back seat.

Hepy bday

2009-03-08T04:29:00.008+08:00

Its almost 5 in the morning and here I am, wide awake and the worse part is, I'm actually run out of things to get all silly about. I can barely close my eyes that even the Golf Channel over at Astro wasn't much of a help.

So I thought since the drugs I snorted earlier have yet to deceive my mind, I'd post something for today because after all, its March the 8th. Yea, that very day makes its round yet again. No prize in guessing the significant of this very day.

I mean, how on earth could we, the caring (Malaysian) citizens, ever forget?

It's Dato Seri Samy Vellu Sangalimuthu's 69th birthday.

Pirantha naal valthukkal, uncle!

Happy Birthday!

(Tamil phrase courtesy of Moz.)

Make me bad

2009-03-03T05:43:00.007+08:00

As part of the OKU community, I thought I’d try this simple method of get-rich-quick scheme by seeking donation through sympathy. After all, we are always stereotypically being portrayed as just that -donation seekers- even though that’s not necessarily the truth.

Since none of the cheapskate devils are willing to part crazy amount of money for my untainted soul, I’m gonna do the right thing by cutting the price to a more affordable rate. Hopefully this time around someone out there will buy it out and send me a step closer to catch an evil band strutting their devil music right here, on Malaysian stage.

Willing to do a write up curry favouring your favourite political icon for a piece of ticket to catch...

ehem... in the flesh.

The deal couldn’t get any better. Its negotiable!

Any takers? Satan?

drop me an email.

Buy me!

2009-02-20T12:19:00.004+08:00

So the other day, some of us wheelchair homeys got together over some drinks and drugs down at the spinal ward. The discussions as some may have guessed, lead to politics, and a certain Yb Hee-she in particular.

We collectively agreed that Hee, or rather, she, had to a certain extent, tarnished the good name of the disabled community in general.

We thought that her action had further strengthens the impression that wheelchair-users are in fact, a desperate lot who can be bought cheaply in return for material goods.

I mean, she had no qualm betraying the trust given by the public for a lousy Camry, right?

Come on man, you don’t sell your soul to Setan gondol for a stupid Cam…

Eh, wait. Hold on.

What, really?

Mega million bucks as part of the deal?

Ok that’s it man, screw the OKU community.

Get me, devils. I am soooo sold!

Look who's talking

2009-02-17T12:04:00.002+08:00

Nude pics. Rarely I’d say this but really, what’s the fuss about it in the first place?

A politician sleeps in her nude, then unscrupulous individual rudely invaded her privacy and (somewhat unsurprisingly) her detractors jumped out at this lifetime opportunity to put her down politically

First and foremost, she’s a human being, like you and me. She has every right to lead a life like everyone else. Its just unfortunate that her personal activity was made known to public and being a politician made it even worse, no thanks to those only with political interest to tarnish their rival’s good name.

The worst part is, suddenly those who made the call acted as if they are a piece of untainted white cloth, free from sin with uncorrupted moral values.

Please don’t give us all the bullcrap about Malaysians not ready to accept leaders embroiled in scandals.

Dude, where the hell have you been man? Scandal-free leaders? We’ve had (and had to put up with) them for decades. Go check it out, its in your own backyard.

As a politician, she has done quite a wonderful job that demanding her to vacate her political post is uncalled for. She was after all, voted into office by the majority. The question of betrayal to the people must never arise because as a fellow human, I think she deserves sometime to her own. Whatever takes place behind closed door shouldn’t be any of our concern. Mind your own business, anyone?

Let’s put it clear and simple; if anyone feels the need to put her political career to the test, then by all means, go ahead but judge her as a politician.

Comprende, Mr Ex-mb?

Y’know what’s even funnier, el-tempe quoted as saying to let people decide if they still want her.

People to decide? Rrrrright. Since when?

Ready, steady, bless off

2009-02-12T11:06:00.003+08:00

Readyyyyyyyy…

Steadyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy…

Aaanndddd……

Look ma, I can write again! Whoop-dee-doo.

Hey I’m back. Still in one piece, much alive but not quite kicking, if you get what I mean.

Initially I needed sometime off to clear some mess that have been acting like monkeys on my back. My personal life has been subjected to slander and lies by certain individual(s) with hopes, amongst others, to paint a bad picture on my charming persona. Typical case of jealousy la tu apa lagi.

Y’know, I wouldn’t give a crap but with clash of opinions from people that matters most to me, I thought it was best to just shut the hell up for a while.

But now I’m back, with a new look thanks to the brand new header of course…ehem…ehem…

Not that I’ve got that little setback taken care of, no. In fact, far from it. Its beyond my control. Knowing pricks that they are, they’ll still be lurking around and up to their dirty trick of twisting every word I put up in here.

But I’ve done my part (of seeking approval/blessing). The outcome didn't turn out as I had hoped for. Since I didn’t get any affirmative answer, I felt its best to just move on.

Got other shits to think of anyway, like catching a repeat of useless midweek international friendly.

Or get back to blogging.

Seriously, If I didn’t start today, there’s every possibility this place may end up without a single post throughout February.

Besides, couldn’t find a better occasion for a new entry than today because, its Thursday.

Musical Intermission; Don't Worry Baby

2009-01-14T21:54:00.004+08:00

I’m on an assignment that could change my life for good. Either make or break, I think the time is here that I need to pull this one off, once and for all.

So to a certain extent, its a do-or-(spiritually)die mission.

Die, me tells ya…DIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE…

Ok that was pretty dramatic but still...

DIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...!!!

Have some Mercy

2009-01-09T07:51:00.005+08:00

At the last count, at least 220 children’s lives are lost and more than 3000 have been wounded in Gaza Strip, no thanks to the act of terrorism by the Israelis.

I’m taking the cue from Madame Elviza to spread the word around on Mercy Malaysia’s behalf. They are appealing for cash donation, which will be used to acquire emergency surgical kits, medicines and other hospital equipments to be supplied to the hospitals there in Gaza.

Here’s how you can help and with this small contribution I sincerely hope we could make one huge of a difference.

*Cheque is to be made payable to “MERCY MALAYSIA” and addressed to Mercy Malaysia, Level 2, Podium Block, City Point, Kompleks Dayabumi, Jalan Sultan Hishamuddin, 50050 Kuala Lumpur.

*Cash donations can be made via on-line transmission or deposit at CIMB Bank Account No: 1424-000-6561053.

*Donation form can be downloaded from here.

*Further enquiries are to be directed to +603-22733999 or info@mercy.org.my

Dude, where's your heart?

2009-01-06T06:18:00.010+08:00

We are into the 6th day of the year and here I am, back to my dreadful routine, wide awake even at 6am.

When I made my yearly (same old) vow early last week, I could sense it was to remain a mere vow and all the pledges made are doomed to go right down the tube, like it has always been annually when we're only into our 1st gear on the new calendar.

The thing is, I’ve been chided and insulted for the current physical shape I’m in- to put it rather bluntly, super fat.

But who am I to disagree. Been helping myself on the food intake senselessly that the word diet sounds eerily frightful.

I mean, as much I feel the need to lead a healthier lifestyle, here I am sipping on sodas while puffing away my 3rd stick of the hour.

The least I could do now is to support the campaign against IJN’s privatisation from any money-minded corporate fuckers.

You just never know on this sort of things. Even those who are as fit as a fiddle are known to succumb to heart complications (read; Marc Vivien-Foe), what more to a person who has dinner in mind while digging on his lunch.

Nauzubillah, but it could happen to anyone, including yours truly. Painful enough that your heart goes bonkers, the last thing you need is to spend all your life savings to a heartless corporation, and eventually leaves a huge hole in your pocket.

*Now I feel the need to lepak with Mr Rajan more.

New year, same despair

2009-01-05T11:53:00.002+08:00

Just to inform everyone that I’m very much alive still, although not quite kicking.

The reason(s) why this blog has been long abandoned is simple. The horrible connection is to blame, which had constantly driven me up the freaking wall lately. I had no choice but to be on borrowed laptop, stolen wireless connection and became a cheapskate yuppie for a few weeks in order to get some of the important work done.

Hope to get back real soon, with no interruption and all that shit.

A big thank you to all on the wonderful New Year’s greetings. Wishing everyone likewise.

Gotta wheel off again. I’m on borrowed machine. Can’t hold her back for too long.

Boinnngggggg…

Done for the year

2008-12-23T22:00:00.003+08:00

Enough with the kung-fu shoe thingy. That issue was so last week I’m totally done with it.

Personally, it has been a relatively quiet week and since I don’t have anything good to say, its best to just shut the hell up.

By the way, do not be hoodwinked by the lack of issues concerning the local crips, or in more politically correct term preferably used by the cultured crippled blokes, Persons with Disabilities (PWDs). Not in any circumstances are everything’s fine and dandy in the community. Far from it. I’m just giving it a rest, as I could do with (figuratively) having both feet comfortably up myself.

It’s the holiday season after all. Got myself an enforced break for this week, which is very welcoming. The timing couldn’t be more perfect than now to close the book for this year.

Meanwhile, I shall be loading some ammo to get some shits moving for the new chapter. Till then, I’m outta here.

Salam Maal Hijrah 1430, merry Xmas, merry New Year and blabla.

Di persimpangan jalan

2008-12-17T10:38:00.011+08:00

Tidak. Apa yang tertera diatas bukanlah sekeping potret Ayah Pin tetapi gambar sepasang kasut. Sepasang kasut yang dimiliki oleh aku.

Dah agak lama juga kasut tersebut berkhidmat untuk aku. Agak-agak lebih kurang dalam lingkungan 2 tahun.

Detractors aku kata ianya kelihatan seperti kasut ballet. Tipikal homofobik la tu.

Bagi aku, reka bentuknya lebih kelihatan seperti sepasang kasut Kung-fu yang digunakan oleh Jackie Chan dalam wayang gambar Drunken Master.

Apa yang membuatkan aku tertarik pada jenis kasut ni masa mula-mula beli dulu adalah yang pertama, ianya mudah disarung.

Kedua, harganya yang begitu berpatutan dan tidak menjangkaui bajet, atau dalam erti kata lain, murah.

Dan yang ketiga, kasut ni agak ringan, maka ianya tidaklah sesuai untuk dilempar pada muka George W Bush, yang kini bakal menjadi mantan Presiden Amerika Syarikat.

Masa mula-mula dulu memang sesuai jugak aku pakai ke mana-mana majlis; baik yang formal mahupun tidak. Jumpa royalty ke, VVIP ke, pedulik apa, aku tetap pakai kasut cabuk ni.

Tapi sekarang ni aku sendiri rasa dah tiba masanya untuk kasut ni pergi dan digantikan dengan sepasang yang lebih berkualiti.

Aku sedang memikirkan sepasang kasut yang berjenama belang tiga. Ironinya ia jenis kasut berlari. Bukan aku nak lari tetapi keringanannya membuatkan aku berkenan.

Dan kalau aku angkat jugak, ianya berkemungkinan besar akan meninggalkan lubang yang besar didalam dompet aku.

Tapi kalau sebaliknya pula, kemana-mana pergi terpaksalah menggunakan kasut cabuk tersebut sementara menunggu kalau-kalau ada bajet bulanan yang berlebihan.

Ini yang membuatkan aku berada di persimpangan dilemma.

Gardening: blaming on the soil?

2008-12-09T11:48:00.001+08:00

I think Md Khir Toyo must have lost his mind to point finger at the new government for not doing much to tackle the landslide problem. Hey, the present gomen may not be the best there is but blaming a government that’s barely 10 months into the office actually reflects the true colour of the previous one instead. The former MB might have been grilled well by the press to conveniently put the blame on others and find the easiest way out. Come on, he was at the helm for many years and he is trying to say that his admin played no part in issuing approvals for any of the on-going hill slope projects? I may not have the facts with me but only stupid fools can’t smell the story he has cooked up. Oh well, screw him anyway.

The reality is, when there’s big money involved, enforcement goes straight down the drain. No, money isn’t the main issue here. Developers are business-minded people and they wouldn’t care any less to be accused of practising greed from their part.

I think the frailty of enforcement has been the root cause of it all. Not restricted to hill slope development for weird reason needs not to abide by certain guidelines, even new residential buildings that are not disabled friendly are given the green light to operate. And what happened to a certain building by laws that stated clearly new buildings are compulsory to provide facilities for the disabled? If enforcement had been strictly carried out, not even a ridiculous amount of money can break the law.

I’m blaming solely on the lack of enforcement that causes many lives lost. Equally, condo residents with disability are not spared from this irresponsible act by the agencies concerned.

Until they buck the fuck up, many others will fall victims due to feeble enforcement.

Another day and another tag

2008-12-05T01:47:00.007+08:00

Time to get another tag done, courtesy of Shah of the TalkOnly fame.

By the way Bro, this is the umpteenth time you passed it on to me. Cant remember if I had ever returned you the favour but mark my word, you’re on top of the list whenever the next one make its round.

Kahkah…

Alrighty, lets see whatever hell there is to be done here…

1. Do you think you’re hot?

Smokin’.

2. Upload a favourite picture of you.

3. Why do you like the picture?

Seen here with the people I can always count on. There are occasions when you can tell some friends are best described as mere acquaintance. The two lads on wheels have shown time and again what friendship is all about. They’d wheel with you through thick and thin.

The odd one out by the way is my cousin but we’re more like brothers.

4. When was the last time you ate pizza?

Two weeks ago. I could have had something else but I was alone on this; the majority flexes their muscle and it was a landslide victory for Pizza Hut over Kayu- which garnered only ONE vote.

5. The last song you listened to.

A Halim’s Kisah dan Tauladan. This has nothing to do with the lip-smacking ayam golek Pak Halim I gobbled down last Sunday.

6. What are you doing right now.

Getting down to this damn thing.

7. What name would you prefer besides yours?

Fab Max. That’s like the coolest name ever to be given to any mankind. Something like Rocco Siffredi or Frank Zappa but way, way sleeker. Its like, you don’t need a licence to carry around a gun if your name is Fab Max. Only hunks (like me) are entitled to have this name written on his I.C, y'know.

There you have it. Now for the fun part. I think we are required to tag another two person to keep this tag going.

Cikgu Nazir is definitely one, because in a way he ASKED for it…kihkihhh…

And Ridzzy…Ridzzy the snake charmer. He’s relatively new in the blogging business I thought it’d be fitting to get him do this for the first time.

IDD 2008; time to sit back & chill

2008-12-03T02:34:00.007+08:00

Hey, if you guys didn’t know yet, it’s the International Day of Persons with Disabilities today. I didn’t realise it myself until the clock hit 12 some hours ago.

Usually I’d get excited over this very day. Well, not as excited as anticipating Hari Raya or something to that extent but for the past 5-6 years I’ve never missed the national level celebration.

Take away the long, useless speech from the minister and you get a joyous occasion worth celebrating.

Not this year however. When I informed my wheel buddy that he wont be seeing my face for this year’s do, i was straight away accused of being fussy and selective towards the venue where it will be held.

He’s got a point. Unlike previous years when the celebration was normally being held at fancy malls such as the berjaya Times Square and most recently Sunway Pyramid, this time around (today) the shindig shifted to Pusat Latihan where obviously having fun is something remotely possible.

Maybe he was close but that’s not quite the reason, so still no Gran Havana Punch.

I decided to skip this year as a sign of protest. No prize in guessing why. I anticipated this year’s going to be the same old affair picked up from the last. Pledges will be made, more talks and it all ends there when the minister leaves the hall.

Then the day will be officially over once goody-bags were distributed to all participants. Tell me something new.

Unless something is done that could significantly help the community all over the country, I’m staying away while at the same time take more shots at the authorities concerned.

Maybe I’m alone on this that it can barely move a feather but at least I get to do what matters to life most; get one of the works done tomorrow and earn extra cash by the end of the week.

Till the next one (Dec 3) comes along; Happy whatever day!

Pengumuman Khas

2008-12-01T03:17:00.004+08:00

This is a community service announcement. Nilai University College (Nilai UC), where my buddy Mr Anfield Devotee is attached with, will organise a seminar on Autism and are hoping to reach to as many potential participants as possible. My hope is that this announcement will reach the right people, i.e those who are either direct or indirectly involved with Autism will come across this piece and keen to take part in the seminar. With all the names lined up as speakers, I’m sure we will learn a lot about this brain disorder syndrome.

The least we could do is to spread the word around. I’m positive by doing so we are actually contributing something to the society, via a very minimal effort.

And with this little effort, who knows, you could make a huge of a change for the better and ultimately improve a soul’s life.

For those interested, check out the details of the seminar below. Thank you.

AUTISM & ASPERGER'S SYNDROME SEMINAR

Nilai University College (Nilai UC) together with the Faculty of Allied Health Sciences UKM is organising a seminar featuring updates on high functioning autism and asperger's syndrome.

ABOUT THE SEMINAR:

The seminar brings together a panel of local and international speakers who are renowned practitioners in this area. Together they will cover topics on the assessment and identification of the disorders, available professional treatment and the empowerment of parents and caregivers in a specially crafted half day seminar.

DETAILS OF SEMINAR:

Title : Making sense of another piece of the puzzle: Updates on High Functioning Autism and Asperger’s Syndrome

Date : 20th DECEMBER 2008 (Saturday)

Time : 8.30am-1pm

Venue : UKM KL Branch, Jalan Raja Muda Abdul Aziz

Fees : RM30nett per person (fee includes tea break)

TOPICS:

FOR SPEAKER PROFILES PLEASE GO TO

:http://www.nilai.edu.my/Autism_Seminar/Autism.htm

1. Assessment, Diagnosis and Associated Difficulties by Clinical Assoc. Prof. Dr. Zasmani Shafiee

Consultant Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist, Gleneagles Medical Centre Penang

2. Cognitive Behaviour Therary by Ms. Winnie LauClinical Psychologist, Minds and Hearts, Brisbane, Australia

3. Parent Empowerment by Dr. Alvin Ng Lai OonClinical Psychologist, Faculty of Allied Health Sciences, Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia

To register, please call my colleague - Ms. Shoba at 06-8502338 ext 298 or email seminardec20@nilai.edu.my

Finding issues

2008-11-27T11:00:00.004+08:00

I received some emails from anons a.k.a silent readers, wondering what I’ve been up to lately and why I have not been updating as frequently.

First of all, I truly appreciate their concern and for having to go through the trouble to check on any updates here every so often only to be greeted with the same posting from last week.

To be honest, I am not up to anything exciting besides earning a living, which I can always use as an excuse.

And I can always blame this temporary loss of idea due to writer’s block but that’s not quite the case.

Here’s the thing. I’m trying to stay focus and bomb this blog only with disability issue at least for the time being. Which means no footie, and definitely no politics as what I have vowed to stay away from as long as I could.

But its never easy to come up with something on regular basis when you limit yourself to a single topic- in this case, issue that concerns the disabled community in our country.

Hey, not by any means are we- the OKUs- currently living in a wonderful time, where everything is rosy, fine and dandy. Not by a long shot.

Our woes are far from over. If I were to bitch about it, our daily adversity can be made into a book and the end product will be twice thicker than all Hefner’s magazine collection combined.

In fact, I doubt if our problem will see any ending to it.

Take public transport for example, the community’s age-old quandary. If you think by making it compulsory for all buses to provide facilities for wheelchair-user would shut our mouth for good, you’re way off the mark. There’s the roadside curb to think of, the uneven ground,…then there’s the mentality of the people involved; the driver, the PBT personnel, the assholes etc.

You get the drift. It will be a long and tedious campaign, numerous of lobbying just to get one dealt with. Then while getting to the next woe, the other one will be lost in oblivion.

The cycle will go on, while us in the community will still be in the stinky quicksand waiting to be rescued.

So basically it’s the same thing. I can always come up with a different shit every other day for the sake of updating but you will pretty much sniff the same smell, and ultimately throw up.

To those who have written in, I thank you all once again for sticking around.

How about this- for your sake, I’ll create an issue and give em authorities concerned a reason to retire early.

Ok ah?

Political foes

2008-11-18T04:26:00.003+08:00

If anyone of you had noticed, its been a while since I touched anything on our political state of affairs. I don’t think I can come up with a better reason than trying my best to shed this socio-political blogger image that I’ve been carried over my head which I can very much do without.

Just being realistic, I simply don’t have the cut to become one. Another attempt and I might end up writing the most slanderous and libellous political piece that would make even the likes of Utusan feel like a greenhorn spinner.

The thing about politics is, it has become somewhat predictable. Take the on-going amno’s nomination process for instance; the odds are on Muhyiddin to take the number 2 spot. Betting against him would be like putting your money on Titus Bramble to walk away with FIFA's best player award.

Even the US presidential election held recently, you don’t need Madam Zora to tell you of the eventual outcome.

And politics, it divides people. Even the gayest of bedfellows –let alone strangers- would not hesitate having a go at each other’s throat, all in the name of defending their respective political beliefs.

We are passionate lot, strongly believe in the party of our choice and their struggle. Tell me something new. Not a single political figure is sparred from being criticised for being one of the front-liners of a party that does not suit the critic’s taste bud.

By all means man, take a shot or 3.

But when a critic takes a swipe at his buddy for upholding the latter’s political stand, that is as far I can stomach and exactly where my line is drawn.

Friendship goes beyond everything, including politics. But apparently not to some over-charged ‘political pundits’, which is a sad case.

Politics is a game played by politicians. If one feels like delving into it so much, go ahead and join a party of your choice. Stand up and lick your master’s bottom. Once a big shot party man, you’re a class above your former friend. This is the time you can kick his bottom real good because you’re an established politician and he is…well, JUST another one of your ex-friends.

I am however, a friend of you lot. Do consider me as yours too for reason I am not a politician. I may be a Mahathirist as we are fondly known nowadays, or a PAS sympathiser for that little twist of political unpredictability. But above all, I am just like you people who shits every morning, and who may share common interests in football, rock & roll or even favourite porn stars for that matter.

Its not difficult to just sit together over a few glasses of Teh tarik without touching on this petty topic we could do without, or is it?

Its almost 5am, I’m off to bed now.

Make believe: happy man in a happy land

2008-11-11T04:54:00.004+08:00

I’m a frustrated soul. Can’t help but to simply whinge and whine non-stop for every single shit that does not suit my fancy. The parking space, the disabled-unfriendly bowling alley, the arrogant Mr supervisor proudly defending his company’s stupid policy and I tell ya, basically everything under the sun.

Maybe I should just stay at home and die from excessive boredom instead of making life harder for others.

But its beyond my control. My outings lately were never short of incidents. For whatever reason I couldn’t tell myself. Maybe for flexing my rights as a disabled citizen I became more sensitive on certain issues that I have no qualms to hit out at every hitch that crosses my path.

I hate it when people tend to (figuratively) look down on me just because I’m a crippled guy on wheelchair.

On one occasion, a flea market retailer ticked my girlfriend for touching his selling goods and he was fully aware she was with me. To me that points out to only one thing; a clear disrespect shown to both of us because for one, she has the right as a customer and secondly, either this bastard thinks I’m a stupid retard on wheelchair or I can only watch while my girl being pushed around.

Lets not get into what transpired next but I wish I had done more like forcing the guy to fucking lick my wheels clean.

No man, I’ve never behaved like a thug, let alone being one because I know where I ’stand’. But neither have I been so pissed than that particular afternoon. In the heat of the moment, especially when your pride is at stake, anger controls your mind. If it means creating a scene to put the record straight, then be it. That guy deserves more than just some piece of my mind.

Nonetheless I’ll always keep my ammo all set. I don’t wanna look stupid hence the need to constantly be on my toes.

And I’ve got my own weapon too in case some assholes are trying to be funny; a urine bag full of fresh, warm pee. Shaken but definitely not stirred.

So pukimak kau, drink to that.

Idiots at work

2008-11-03T03:15:00.005+08:00

So I was at the nearest Giant Mall the other day to get some personal stuff, which is not really a biggie, right? Definitely not because this wasn’t my first trip there.

But certain matter can do with urgent attention.

Here’s the thing, for the umpteenth times running we couldn’t get the best parking spot which is obviously reserved for the disabled, because it was always taken by someone else.

I am not being fussy about this whole parking issue, as the mall provides ample parking space for all shoppers. But we have our own reason to not park our vehicle meant for other shoppers because usually designated parking lots are wider, which makes it easier for us to alight from our vehicle and transfer to the wheelchair.

Yes, we need that extra space.

So anyway, since we rarely get the chance to use this particular parking spot, it hits on me that afternoon to check if these people actually have the right to enjoy the privilege or otherwise. On that day, this commercial van below was conveniently seen parked there.

As I pretty much had guessed - after a quick check with the staff wandering about the parking bay- the driver was not in any ways crippled. I know it sounds rather cliché but cant help to think if the driver was indeed suffering from some kind of mental illness.

I did the next best thing (or so I thought!) and went up to a security personnel to ask if he was aware of a certain dickhead parking his vehicle illegally. To my surprise he did and went on to explain the driver used the parking space to do some deliveries.

And I thought that’s it? The goddamn driver had to send some stuff so he was allowed to fucking break the feeble law. That easy.

Ok so the driver is a stupid dickhead, and we can all agree to that but to deal with the security guy who apparently turns out to be a bigger dickhead, I totally didn’t see that coming, to be very honest.

Y’know, I always thought that by displaying a sticker that verifies you as disabled driver is not good enough because time and again we witness assholes tend to abuse the ruling. The best solution I thought was to have a security personnel permanently stationed at the parking spot but judging by the case above, even the enforcer couldn’t give 2 hoots about it.

I cant help to believe the disabled community in our country are still being marginalized, even in this age and era. Ask everyone and chances are majority of you lot, like that security guy minus his stupidity, couldn’t really give a shit because not just it’s kinda trivial, it is also none of your business to begin with.

Hey, no man, I am not blaming you. Its just a simple observation I did lately and if the case above is not shitty enough, I had to put up with another typical (and bigger) case of discrimination on the same weekend. For this bigger crap however, a bigger spotlight is required.

However, regardless the size of each crap, it still stinks. And thus, strengthens my belief.

* A shout-out to one Mr Mohd Fitri!

Dial-up: I feel so Yesterday

2008-10-29T12:20:00.004+08:00

Damn it man, I have been without any internet connection since last week and calling the TM guys have been very much part of my boring routine these past few days.

Now that this case affects even my bread & butter, it in a way has given me a reason to harass them every minute and call them names for all the crappy crap crap I have to put up with.

But I’ve got my temper checked. They came up with a valid reason; that some cables near my place were stolen and as far major repair is concerned, it is going to take a while before normal service can be fully restored. Whether or not it’s a genuine excuse, I’ll just be a sucker and suck up to everything they want to tell me.

One option is to create a dial-up connection, which I did and painfully on right now. I dont know about you guys but after so many years of relying on high-speed broadband for any Internet activity, surfing on a dial-up connection can be a real test of the nerve. It is just not surf-able and super duper crappy kuasa dua.

Nothing that I want now than to have my broadband connection back. It feels so weird without it. Its been almost a week since I last drooled on pictures of naked anime soccer moms that I myself feel so naked, only minus the eroticism.

And political news, fuck man, I need more balance report before the terrestrial tv can claim victory to have successfully persuaded a sucker to buy all the grandmother’s story they cook everyday. Ok maybe not that simple but to a certain degree, I too need to know what’s been cooking on the other side of the fence.

I think I’ll just get the hay outta here for now. To those who left feedback in the previous post, rest assured I will get back to you once the connection comes back.

Lets hope it wont take its own sweet time.

Back to life

2008-10-23T11:07:00.000+08:00

The worst part about a vacation is the end of it, or the long journey back home.

After spending days in a dreamland, getting back to reality can be extremely dreadful, which is exactly what I’m experiencing right now. Breaking out of routine is almost heavens-like but getting back to it is triple the hell that sometimes I wish I had not taken any break in the first place.

Ok, maybe not about coming back as you tend to miss your room at some point of the holiday break but to kick-start your routine again is what makes it tough. To add to the misery, you are greeted with piles of workload craving for your attention to get it done.

Getting out of the usual routine is what I look forward to the most when on a holiday and the last trip was no different. I managed to stay clear completely from any news; be it the newspapers, the ever-so-crap news on terrestrial tv stations, blogs and even from any sports event, from F1 to Arsenal’s league game. Well…ok maybe not the last one.

Who am I kidding right? Although I stayed away from the tele on that footie night, my mind was always at The Emirates. I specifically told my friend to only let me in on the full time result but as if that would work. Anyway, glad it was a favourable result or the whole vacation would have been ruined. Maybe I should plan my next holiday during international friendly weekend. That ought to do it.

Now its back to square one, struggling to find the rhythm of getting back to a boring life again.

I should just stay at home for now while making some bucks.

Yamseng to all the guys!

2008-10-16T11:39:00.003+08:00

As usual, I’ll be making my weekend hiatus, only this time it starts much earlier. In the mean time I will leave you guys with a video that some of you might enjoy it to bits.

This entry in a way, is specially dedicated to all you men who have been kind enough to frequently visit this humble blog.

Plus, I’ve got a point to prove, if you know what I mean.

muahahhaha...

Ok fellas, let's get down to it, grab your own mic and everybody all together now…

More about Kerp

2008-10-13T21:05:00.004+08:00

Finally after a long absent it makes its round again and being a whore at it, it was only a matter of time before I am tagged. Thanks to Missy Constant Drama, the lady who passes the tag baton, now everybody will get to know me up-close and erotically personal. Ok maybe not that close but 15 random facts I’m required to reveal of myself, which can be pretty revealing too.

So here goes…

No 1. This has nothing to do with the latest move by a certain dumb state gomen but I’ve always wanted a federal Datukship. Not for the status but its monthly allowance.

No 2. I can wriggle both my ears but it never crossed me to join any freak shows nor political parties.

No 3. Contrary to popular belief, I only have 9 sexual fetishes instead of 10.

No 4. Once I spent a whole ill gotten RM150 on an Irish hat instead of food. I’m a Muslim!

No 5. I once killed a rabbit with a Thundercat sword.

No 6. I’ve never watched Titanic and am damn proud of it, man!.

No 7. I read one book per year because am already an accomplished smart ass.. S-m-r-t, smart!

No 8. Me was a closet Paul Gascoigne fan.

No 9. I can’t complete a day without a plate or 3 of plain rice.

No 10. Caught peeping once.

No 11. Trying to be less homophobic as possible.

No 12. During my earlier stage being a crippled dude, the sight of wheelchair disgusts me to bits.

No 13. I still have some soft spots reserved for Selangor football club.

No 14. I can still do this- *hand gesture*.

No 15. A big fan of Jackie Chan’s, which begs a question if he will ever conferred a Tan Sriship. He has after all, made more than one movie here.

There we have it. Any questions will not be entertained in public.

Now to pass it on-

Shah, you’re one. Cikgu nazir, Bala, you guys too. Farina, kak Pi, Anita akka, you’re it, ladies. Pak Zab, you’re it. Razlin, Dato Jaff, both It. DocTA, Jim Broga, Mad Salo, Elviza, all are it. Lim Kit Siang, you’re it. Khir Toyo, Husam Musa, it. Ir Nizar, Ali, Kayveas, it, it, it and it…fuck it, you’re all it.

Reform

2008-10-10T12:47:00.002+08:00

10 ways for a political party to redeem itself and make it more relevant and appealing to the masses, particularly today’s young generation.

1. Get rid of all the deadwoods. They’re a pest and a liability not just to the party, but the world population as a whole.

2. Prohibit a certain guy who is a known dumbass from contesting the number two post that could possibly pave way for him to take over the top seat. The last thing the youth needs is to gamble on the future by having a stupid asshole running the show.

3. Racist must be sacked immediately. Too many assholes will only dent the party’s credibility deeper.

4. Youth wing should do without old geezers at the helm.

5. See-through attire for the Puteris. A sure bet to appeal to the male (and some female) masses.

6. Pink trousers for the youth wing. If that does not attract much attention, I don’t know what will.

7. Rope in the real deal clowns. As the saying goes; leave it to the pros.

8. Money politics must go. 200 bucks is downright an insult unless…the bribery fetches up to rm10k per vote.

9. Treat all members like VIP. Everybody gets to cramp the exclusive room and join the orgy with their older counterparts. Sure more to sign up.

10. Give me a multi-million Ringgit project and I’ll reveal point number 10.

The weirdness is getting out of hand. In my mind I picture a gnome-like creature taking over the hot seat come March. But come to think of it, better goblins than a mere puppet.

Gardening part III

2008-10-07T10:37:00.001+08:00

I don’t know about you folks but I’m very much still in festive mood. Since however, I have some issues with our cabinet ministers a.k.a the so-called VIPs that needs to be straightened out, I thought I’d take a break from the celebration, take a swipe at them and will be on my way again.

I have long accepted the fact I’m not a VIP. Which means if I had attended the PM’s annual open house do recently, I wont get to enjoy raya goodies in the comfort of VIP’s section that separates these bastards from the people.

And these are the same bunch claiming to be people’s leaders?

Come on tell me, why the need to have a special room for these lot, instead of mingling around, or queuing up for food for that matter just like hordes of attendees did that day?

To be quite honest, I personally couldn’t see the rationale behind this VIP room thing when the event was supposed to be one of the rare occasions when these fellas should instead mix around, rubbing shoulders with the people or simply sit next to an average joe for a meal or two.

I refuse to use the word commoner on us. That’d only make those fuckers feel more important than the crowd, who took the trouble enduring long queues just to catch a glimpse of our so-called big-shot leaders.

Well, get this; Fuck all cabinet ministers. Maaf zahir dan batin.

Gone Raya

2008-09-29T13:12:00.004+08:00

Takbir bergema di pagi hari,
Indah suasana memecah sepi,
Kepada semua salam aidilfitri,
Ampun maaf ikhlas dari Kerp Ph D.

Kepada rakan2 semua, jika selama ini ada carutan, caci maki juga kata2 kesat yang hanya boleh ditemui didalam majalah porno telah mengguris hati dan menganggu minda anda yang bersih, ampun maaf dipinta ikhlas dari hati si penulis blog ini. Ia berkemunkinan besar tidak disengajakan dan jika ada yang terasa, ianya hanyalah kebetulan semata.

Thanks to all for sticking around, and for having to put up with all my crap through out this past year. My apologies if the reading materials here have not been up to your quality standard but rest assured, more craps coming your way.

Ok, lagi sekali…maaf zahir dan batin. Salam aidilfitri and happy holidays to my non-Muslim friends.

For obvious reason, this blog will take a long break, and will be back once the blog-owner is fully stuffed.

The ward

2008-09-26T11:47:00.004+08:00

Maybe I’ve ran out of issue to swear at, or maybe it is just that annual thing when my mind is focussed solely on Syawal which is looming. Whatever it is, I have switched everything off to cherish every bit of the moment till at least the end of next week.

A visit to K9 spinal ward at HKL last night was never part of my plan but nonetheless, no better timing than the holy month of Ramadan to do some charity work by giving my bits back to society.

Ok, not exactly in monetary form because I needed that myself. Our presence was good enough to put some smile on their faces. A crack or two on lame political jokes did the trick for the much-needed icebreaker.

A trip down the ward has always been an eye-opener. Not that I have yet to come to terms with the gloomy ambience of the ward. It was the patient, some of who are friends from the earlier days that kinda moved me.

Going from one bed to another, suddenly you come to realise sitting on wheelchair isn’t about all things shitty.

And it has made me realise that one is never confined on wheelchair because for the very sole purpose, it makes us more mobile. Being bed-ridden however is a totally different circumstance all together. You are stuck. If its mere consolation, you are stuck with buddies who shares your pain.

I’m lucky in many aspects. Gone were the days when taking meals had to be done while lying on the stomach due to my busted ass. Nor the meals had to be finely blended to accommodate my digestive system.

I could go on and on.

That ward is one special place. It has played a very instrumental role in getting me where I am today. I may not be some big shot but as long I can give something back to someone who’s about to go through exactly what I’ve gone through many years ago, I think I deserve a Datukship for that.

An entry about gardening pt II

2008-09-23T12:30:00.004+08:00

So Tun Dr Mahathir’s Chedet has reached a whopping 7 million hits last week. The fact that he only started to blog last May, that number of visitors thronging his website is simply impressive to say the least.

But I think pakdol can top his predecessor’s blogging achievement. If he had a blog, in no time will he get 22 million on his hit-counter…demanding him to resign!

Kahkahhh…

Ok that’s a lame one. I just need a breather before continuing with the shits I’ve been up to since last weekend. And I mean tons of it that I hope to get it all cleared up before the Raya week starts.

Then after that, its RAYA TIMEEEEEEEEE…

Burrp…oops…muahahaha…

Ahmad for senator post

2008-09-19T03:47:00.004+08:00

As usual, I had a long pangsai session last night, and while at it cant help but to ponder on our country’s current state of affairs. The political development stinks like hell it made the whole bathroom smells like being in a public cab.

I concur with one beer-bellied buddy that we have been too soaked up on the political skirmishes we missed on stuff that craves for our attention more.

Like in my case; it’s the disability issue.

Much have been said and we’re beginning to sound like scratched CDs.

Some may remember the posting I did sometime back when Datuk Ismail Md Salleh was duly appointed to represent the disabled community in Dewan Negara. The appointment was received with mixed reaction within the community but me forever being an optimist, gave him all the benefits that he’d kick some balls hard while enjoying the parliamentary immunity.

But its been 9 long months. All we hear were more and more grouses. When Mr Senator were supposed to speak on the community’s behalf, it appears that he lacks the fire-power that we had hoped for. The Sepultura we anticipated turns out to be a mere Air Supply.

We’ve got the Persons with Disability Bill 2008 past some 2 months back that needs to straighten out urgently. Because once enforced, it would certainly mean our welfare will finally be seriously looked into.

The by laws in the act are in some ways, capable to protect us from being oppressed by you lot. Its like, you screw with us, we fucking shove up screws and pliers up your ass in return and get protected by the law. Or something like that.

So we need that badly. And we are gravely in need of someone who can handle the bazooka, which the current senator lacks the quality required.

I’m sure Datuk Ismail has tried his darnest best but honestly without sounding too mean, I think its best he made way for a new face to take over the mic.

Can somebody enlighten me if senators can be replaced when the incumbent fails to perform? Or to put it simply, flops?

The next question in everyone’s mind; will the real senator-material please stand up?

No pun intended but I’ll handle that.

Ahmad for senator post 2009!

Aku seorang rasis

2008-09-17T22:34:00.004+08:00

Waktu aku tersekat didalam traffic jalanraya tempoh hari, mata aku melilau dikiri dan kanan kereta seperti biasa, manalah tahu ada pemandu perempuan sedang membetul-betulkan colinya. Namun aku kecewa kerana, yang aku dapat lihat kebanyakannya hanyalah lelaki-lelaki cina sedang berbual melalui telefon bimbit masing-masing. Ia membuatkan aku terfikir, mungkin bagus juga zaman sekarang kerana adanya technologi telefon bimbit ni. Sekurang-kurangnya kuranglah mamat2 cina ni mengorek hidung kerana ada telefon telefon bimbit untuk melepaskan kebosanan ketika.

Hari tu, aku berbuka di restoran India. Dah puas cekik aku pun bayar. Terkejut beruk makyeh bila harga ayam masala yang aku dah mamah harganya mahal, begitu ke tahap nak mampos. Servis budak India sorang tu jauh dari memuaskan. Seperti biasa disebabkan takut nak berterus terang, aku maki mamat India tu dengan perkataan paling kesat,iaitu pundek, tapi dalam hati je sebab aku takut. Mereka ramai. Yang sorang tu badan tegap dan berbuncit arak, tangan dan dada berbulu-bulu, seperti kingkong bundy.

Bercerita tentang kemarahan, tadi selepas berbuka aku bengang kerana Karipap yang aku makan tadi haram tak sedap. Rasanya teramat tawar, juga begitu ke tahap nak mampos. Mungkin lah sibudak melayu yang menjual karipap tersebut boleh memberi puasa sebagai alasan. Namun bagaimana pula pada bulan-bulan lain, dimana karipap tetap tawar tiap-tiap kali beli dengan dia. Kuih buah melaka pula penuh dengan tepung je. Setakat gula melaka seto’et lebih baik digelarkannya sahaja sebagai kuih buah dada.

Macam pantat. Hari ni aku berbuka kenyang dengan carutan disebabkan penipuan.

Seperti juga bulletin utama yang aku tonton tadi. Penipuannya ketahap nak mampos kali dua. Menontonnya bukan kerana ingin mengetahui berita terkini yang penuh dusta. Aku nak tukar ke filem orang putih tetapi alat kawalan jauh berada begitu jauh dari bilik air dimana aku sedang berada tadi sambil melakukan aktiviti berak.

Ahmad...

Think of the children

2008-09-15T12:43:00.005+08:00

Again, I had wanted to write a political piece but would reach a halt at almost every sentence.

It was a racial issue to be precise, just like everyone else are doing, instead of mere politics.

There was just something inside that I felt the need to spill it out, badly.

But will I be given the assurance I wont be sharing the same fate as the DAP detainee for trying to get the truth into light? I am after all, not a member of that particular…ehem…pertubuhan partai…

The report I came across last night kinda cajoled me to go with my guts and let it out.

Here’s the thing, when probed by a reporter if the guy who triggered this racial issue up was above the law, Mr Minister cleverly replied saying the culprit has been severely punished by the party.

Dude, 3 beladi long years I tell ya.

That’s awfully harsh. Now this guy cant even play an active role in all the party’s activity, which includes being a part of the up-coming party election.

Ya amponnnn…must be miserable for him. I mean, come on, think of his children, possibly young children. And his beloved wife and aging parents too.

Its gotta be painful for the whole family their bread-winner is no longer the party’s branch head. The children must be crying by now that their dad will not be holding any important party post for 3 long years.

But I’m sure in these trying times, his family members will stick together and appeal to the party’s supreme council to at least think of the children.

A dad without an important role in the party spells misery, not just for his family, but also for his lackeys as a whole.

Oh hey, as it turns out this piece is all about politics after all.

Sell-out

2008-09-12T10:59:00.003+08:00

"And when I'm rich,
And meet Bob Hope,
We'll shoot some golf,
And shoot some dope..." - Dead Kennedys

I am so fucking selling out I tell ya.

Desperate times call for drastic measures, so they say. Couldn't agree more. Better late before its way too late.

I wanna be a tool,
Don't need no soul,
Wanna make big money,
Under Nuffnang's payroll...

*my utmost gratitude to a certain HRH princess who insisted of putting some sense in me. A huge thanks!

Rice cooker

2008-09-11T04:07:00.001+08:00

When I was supposed to get down to a work-related stuff, instead I spent a huge chunk of the night catching up on videos people sent via email. Some of the clips got me totally engrossed that I completely missed the self-imposed dateline. If it had been the real dateline, I’d be totally dead.

The videos, by the way, are not in any ways porn-related in case some of you might be wondering. Apart from it being morally wrong, the downloading process tonight was utterly slow I aborted the idea of getting myself horny and shit.

So anyways, that’s what I’ve been doing lately; sacrificing my sleep to make (week)ends meet. In this current economic bad state, every little opportunity that comes along is a must-grab.

That’s mainly the reason why I have not been updating LGL as often as I would love to. Not that I’ve ran out of issue to rant and bitch about but earning a living, like everyone else, tops the priority list.

Someone actually jogged my memory the reason I started this blog in the first place; highlighting disability issues ala Anthony the councillor guy. But somehow I digressed along the way, writing on politician’s stupidity instead, which was way of the mark from my initial objective.

I guess I’m just being realistic about it. Taking our woes into account seriously is like a dream come true but would the relevant authority even bother to actually take the trouble to google up on blogs that fights for disability issue, let alone reading them all?

Fat chance.

We have had people like Anthony slugging it out for ages. What more through a channel with a much wider audience. But looking at the existing predicaments we have to deal with, all the grouses highlighted seem to have fallen on deaf ears.

Of course the battle will go on, for as long the passion in him is still burning.

On the other hand I have quite a distance still to go before I could even think of becoming another Anthony. He’s in a class of his own.

The line of periuk nasi I’m into currently however, very much requires me to lend a shout or two.

Like a back-up singer, y’know.

All I need to do is to crank the decibel a few notches up.

Farmer joes

2008-09-08T13:42:00.004+08:00

41 MPs flying to Taiwan today and tomorrow

KUALA LUMPUR: A total of 41 MPs who are members of the Barisan Nasional Backbenchers Club (BBC) are expected to leave for Taiwan in batches on Monday and Tuesday.
Deputy BBC chairman Datuk Bung Mokhtar Radin confirmed this on Monday.

So they’re gone.

Gone to a far, far away, agriculturally advanced land called Taiwan with an important mission in hand; exploring and learning the county’s agricultural and industrial technology.

The program is so important the trip has to be now, as in NOW without any further delay.

That urgent.

Our agricultural sector it seems are in dire need of new technology that it had been given priority over 41 constituencies. Ramadan schedules between the MPs and the people who voted them in looks set to take the back seat in the name of…err…farming.

The 41 MPs voluntarily offered themselves. It was a matter of country over constituency. A tough choice to make but precedence prevailed. By hook or by crook, farming woes must be looked into, even if it means travelling to as far as China to seek knowledge.

They’re our country’s heroes. I would like to propose the government to allocate some fund to be used for a grand reception upon their return next week. Lets garland each one of them with the freshest of flower petals available.

In the mean time, lets all look forward to less rasuah baja taik lembu cases in the future.

Stingy Salty Booger

2008-09-03T02:04:00.008+08:00

So today I received an sms from the telco that I have been subscribed to since forever, informing me 20 free smses have been credited into my account. And this was some sort of a gift to their faithful customers for sticking around.

My initial reaction was like, whoa…is this for real or what? Free smses man…now I can send 20 free text messages to all my loved ones around the country and this was supposed to make me feel over the moon. Ok then Mr Maxis, here goes; woohoo…

For being their loyal customer all these years and all I got was a WHOPPING 20 free smses.

What a mug.

20 free sms konon. Cehh…

If you people scared as shit I might switch to your close competitors, it takes more than just bribing us with pittance to buy our loyalty.

On a different matter but as miserly as the telco nonetheless, we have our government who from their part could have been more generous last week.

All the efforts of requesting and lobbying by various disabled groups prior to the recent budget 2009 simply fell on deaf ears.

Our demands were not met with. The only increment we get was an apologetic RM150 for non-working disabled, and this was after much fought from the community for ages.

They’re jobless, naturally they don’t have any form of income to cover all the bills that may incur. Now how the hell can one survive with such meagre amount every month? Medical fees alone can cost triple the allowance.

A people-friendly Budget I hear? Cehh...Feck that shit mannn…

Ramadan Al-mubarak

2008-08-31T22:09:00.001+08:00

The Holy month’s back.

Wishing all my Muslim Brothers and sisters a meaningful Ramadan.

Have a blessed one, y’all!

Sunday

2008-08-31T13:50:00.002+08:00

One pretty boy started the ball rolling and being a good sport, I thought I’d take the cue too, I mean, hey, why not. Its Sunday.

So here goes…

Fuucccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

Fucccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkking fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk…liars can suck monkey's ass and fucking die choking on monkey turd.

Ok I’m done with swearing for the whole month of September at least.

We 'is' Brothers (And sisters)

2008-08-30T02:15:00.003+08:00

They say a picture tells a thousand stories. We’ve got a macha, a typical chinaman, a mamat and hey, even one chindian fella.

The image above has never been tampered nor it was pre-arranged for the camera to be used in some Petronas ad or some shit.

Muhibbah? Perhaps but that particular occasion was the real deal, without making a big fuss of our colour blindness.

For the record, a sole Muslim bloke (me!) who doesn’t drink was exempted from chipping in on the liquor bill. Tolerance prevailed that night.

Realistically we still have a long way to go before we reach the desired peak with pride but it’s happening and you bet, we are moving on the right direction.

Salam Merdeka, fellow citizens!

This entry is about gardening (nothing political)

2008-08-29T01:52:00.009+08:00

Okay, lets not fret. Hopefully with such title this entry will be well disguised.

So, in the wake of MaCai-MaCai shutting down Malaysia Today, and might even have a go at other online news portal of similar contents which most definitely includes sopo weblogs, Sopo Bloggers may have to be in their best behaviour or face a similar fate as RPK’s website.

Either you write all the shit that is music to their ears or it could spell the end of your beloved blog.

I, on the other hand, have come up with several steps that could well save LGL from being a victim of the possible crackdown. I don’t quite belong in the ‘sopo’ category but would rather not take any chance that could see this blog being clamped. Not that I’m freaking and peeing in my pants off but no better ways to start things off than to suck up to them.

Here goes.

- Write stuff that is deemed good enough to be labelled as anti-Anwar.

- Only links to former and current amno leaders’ blogs are fit to be on the sidebar.

- Focus my writing on disability issues and praise every move and policy endorsed by Dr Ng Yen Yen.

- Disassociate myself from the likes of Kickdefella and Zorro.

- Set fire to all posters made by Mob1900

- Make fun of Lim Kit Siang’s GQ hair-do.

- To swear (you bet!)

- To put in print every word reported in Buletin Utama

- Say yes to ISA…Samad.

- Blog about floras and faunas

And finally rename my blog and change the header to Lover of Government Leaders.

Awesome shit I tell ya. Hope this’ll do the trick.

Lets just wait and see.

He's back

2008-08-27T23:43:00.006+08:00

Whether he had fucked some dude’s ass or not, the by-election result yesterday proves that people wants him to be in parliament. What he does behind closed door is secondary.

Why I think Anwar’s victory would take Malaysia to a greater height; Umno/BN’s defeat might just trigger some sense of concern in them. On their part, the defeat should serve as a wake-up call to come back to earth and get back to basic of listening and taking into account of people's wish.

Its not about the man, but Anwar’s one major factor our government will start to buck up when it is long overdue.

Nothing personal against the country’s leadership. It’s always been about bread and butter issue. The government can come up with 1001 reasons to jack prices on essential goods up but they must be nuts to believe that people digs it. The damaged has been done. Most of us are left with huge holes in our wallet.

So when DSAI pledged to revive the country’s economy and uplift the poor amongst his other vows, the people must not be blamed for buying all his words. He may or may not be able to fulfil all the promises made but people will still endorse it because as it is now, the current government has made life a misery to average wage-earning Malaysians.

Playing the racial card has also backfired. They underestimated The Malays of Permatang Pauh, which obviously are more matured than the Umno guys thought they were.

Sure some voters are staunch Anwar’s supporters but the fence-sitters indisputably took bread and butter issue into consideration, and hence turned a deaf ear on every word sworn by pretty boy Epol.

The parliament house couldn’t get any interesting than now. The people have spoken and wanted a strong character, which DSAI obviously possessed to give the current government a run for their money. He will certainly crank the volume up on the opposition side. Strong opposition provides better times ahead, for the people.

The Revival

2008-08-26T03:45:00.005+08:00

This shit has been around for more than a decade now. Not exactly my cuppa as I’ve never liked R&B but I thought I’d make this particular shit an exception. Its some sort of a come back actually, as currently everybody tends to enjoy it. The whole country digs this so I thought it deserves a place in me blog.

Ok fuckers, enjoy listening while I get down to a more serious matter than a by-election; filling up on my empty stomach.

Ahh...

Malaysian Soul

2008-08-22T03:56:00.005+08:00

Somebody asked why I'm yet to display the Jalur Gemilang like I always did in previous years.

Being Malaysians that we are, I was not spared from baseless accusations. Wild speculations have been rife and one being that I was about to launch another initiation ala Sheih, but with a dissimilar way of displaying my displeasure towards whatever fuck’s going on in the country.

Then apparently there has been rumours going around via email I was about to abandon Malaysia to seek a greener pasture in Dubai/Doha/Abu Dhabi (trendy destination for young Malay pros with O&G background).

Another version to this rumour has it that I was seeking political asylum in Morocco to stay with the Berbers in Sahara boozing with the not-so-religious Berber guys.

All because I did not display a JG up next to the bedroom window.

Whatever.

The truth is; I can’t find me a mini-flag in all the shops I went to, simple as that. Fucking retailers either had run out of stock or only sell wedding gowns and dresses. Stupid bridal shop.

For the record, I did not share the same sentiment as Sheih and Uncle Zorro on the flag inversion issue (and am sticking to what I stood for) but by no means I am in total disagreement.

Surely what transpired was done after much thought and consideration had been put into, prior to his action that could well land him in deep shit. He went ahead with it, and that speaks volume of what he believed in.

Similarly, those who took the cue from Kickdefella certainly had thought of the consequences too.

At the end of the day, they’re all Malaysians who probably are more patriotic than any politicians could ever wish to be.

Only fools will believe their intention was to ridicule the national flag. Tell me if that was the case and I’ll be the first to find their home address and bomb their letterbox with fresh human faeces.

For this one, I’m right behind evils fighting for a better Malaysia while my behind is against pirates making lives a misery for Malaysians.

Working YB

2008-08-20T02:33:00.004+08:00

Hell-o…

So I was reading the newspaper and came across this one report on the progress leading to Permatang Pauh’s by-election.

In one of the paragraphs, our TPM was quoted as saying the Rakyat should vote for candidate who works for the people.

And of course I re-read that particular paragraph just to be positively sure.

Elect a YB who will work for the people?

Dude, those guys are in real danger of extinction. Just like the elementals, the sight of this unusual kind is quite rare to a certain extent these days.

Its like, sightings on working YBs can only be viewed via rare, amateur footages. Chances are, most video featuring working YBs caught were hoax. There are in fact, more genuine video footages and still images of living Hogzillas than a working YB.

Lets recap who exactly this bunch of dying breeds are, in case some of us have forgotten why they were referred to as a working YB.

A working YB is someone who makes his round door-to-door as much he possibly could (NOT merely during campaigning seasons) to hear grouses from the same people who voted him in.

A working YB gets down dirty with the people…behind flashing cameras.

A working YB spends his time more at his constituency than minding on useless political issues, unless he's directly involved.

A wanking YB defends developer’s move to rape green lung areas in the name of development.

A working YB fucks Hogzillas.

Majulah Sukan Untuk LGL

2008-08-18T11:41:00.004+08:00

Here’s the reason why I haven’t been updating much lately- sports.

Its been raining sports and all I did was taking the best seat available (according to Astro) and enjoyed all the games on display throughout.

DocTA reminded me of men’s 100m event final on Saturday night and glad I managed to catch the whole race that lasted not more than 10 seconds. Had Tyson Gay been in the picture, I don’t think there’d be any difference on the result. Witnessing the eventual winner for the first time sprinting like mad, I think Usain Bolt will dominate the track for years to come.

Then came the heart-breaker. Lee Chong Wei lost quite tamely I must admit, to Lin Dan in what was supposed to be an explosive affair.

Heck, I’m proud of Chong Wei anyway. I’m sure he gave his best. Sadly his best wasn’t good enough to deliver Malaysia our first ever Olympics gold medal.

This makes me wonder; why in the fucking world is the Olympics committee insisted on leaving sports such as squash and bowling out of the games? Aren’t these sports played globally? when fencing- a sport dominated by the eastern Europeans- has been part of the games for years, I don’t see any reason why the aforementioned sports should be left out the next time around (London 1012). From a malaysian point of view, one gold in the bag is a sure bet.

Just a thought.

Anyway, besides the Olympics, English Premier league finally commences after a 3-month hiatus. No better ways to kick-off the brand new season than having the great Arsenal setting the ball rolling, and winning their season opener. But judging by their first-day display, I thought they were simply sucked. Their performance were rusty and obviously some of the strikers left their shooting boots in the dressing room. Certainly a cause for concern for the Gooners. I know its only the first game and shit but I’m just being realistic; its going to be a tough ride ahead if you’re an Arsenal fan.

Oh, then there’s the champions league final. After clinching the prestigious European club trophy,…

I kept away the PS2 and went for lunch because I was starving like hell.

Making your wish to come true

2008-08-12T03:41:00.003+08:00

Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard,
To fetch her poor dog a bone.
But when she got there,
The cupboard was bare,
And so the poor dog had none.

WHAT’s as empty as Old Mother Hubbard’s cupboard but is full of promises nonetheless? It’s the parliamentary seat left vacant sometime last week.

For politicians and their supporters from both side of the fence, the imminent Permatang Pauh by-election will be some sort of a battle-royale. Pilihanraya Kecil it may be but by no means is it going to be a small affair.

Dubbed as the ‘ultimate’ tussle judging by the political landscaping, digging and dirt that has been flying around since March’s General Election, Permatang Pauh will once again turn into a boxing ring, hosting two coalition representatives slugging it out at each other for that one glorious moment and a season’s pass to the Parliament.

For the folks residing in and around the vicinity however, it’s a windfall. The next time you see a rainbow, my bet is that the trail ends in Permatang Pauh.

Whether apartisan or otherwise, nothing beats in taking this rare opportunity to seek aid, and one can bet his life savings that the request will most definitely be fulfilled.

This is not to advocate the power of suggestion that residents request for a Benz or something ridiculous of that sort; it is but a mere reminder for them to exercise their rights as citizens.
Woes not seriously looked into such as the lack of basic necessities and infrastructure as well as promises made in March but not kept, should be brought to the fore.

From the disabled person’s point of view, this is a bonanza the community must not let slip away. It is a known fact that free fundamental material assistance from the welfare department is hard to come by. With ministers and other political bigwigs almost certain to make their appearances on the streets or even at the front door, they are a ‘captive audience’ to speed up on your impending request.

It is not an every day thing that one gets to be in such a position. A situation where one can directly channel his grouses to those who possess the power of making decisions and changes by a simple order to his or her staff.

It may not be easy to fish for votes but leaders of certain communities are duty bound to assist in the welfare of those in need, whether in their own backyards or otherwise. Taking congnisance of delivering the goods may well do the trick in winning over the voters’ hearts. Ultimately, they might enjoy the catch of the day.

Anything, and I mean anything at all, especially for the benefit of the needy.
By-elections are not easy to come by. In most cases, it happens when an incumbent dies. And odds are we may never see anyone doing a 'Wan Azizah' again.

My point is, carpe diem. Seize this moment of opportunity. Make the best of this rare occasion. If your rightful needs have been neglected, oh, go ahead and milk it; push your luck and your agenda. Whatever.

What matters most it that your due rights are recognised and are taken care of while the political carnival is in town. You might even hit the jackpot.

Every dog has its day, the saying goes, so hopefully someone will stock good old Mother Hubbard’s cupboard this time.

Unbound

Nothing New

2008-08-11T11:05:00.002+08:00

No prize in guessing it right- I’m down with fever yet again.

In fact this is the first time I went online since Friday morning as I have been staying in bed practically through out the weekend.

It was so bad that I lost my voice, lost my appetite, physically weak and I could have even vomited my guts and ribs out if I came across another inverted Jalur Gemilang over the weekend.

Jokes were no fun either. It took one whole day before the punch line finally hits on me…and I’d be like ‘ooooh…so that was it. Now I get it’…and went on laughing out loud alone while watching a Thai love story...the next day.

Now I can feel the pressure coming on to me. I was supposed to study a bill and come out with a piece on it before Wednesday.

Which means I have to cut everything short. Including this entry. Got tons of things to straighten out, particularly this week’s piece. Failing to do so would strengthen some people’s belief that I still have a long way to go before I could make it into the real ass-busting world out there.

I’m sure they meant to say loser.

Whatever. Will be back in a jiffy.

Re-freshening my vow

2008-08-07T02:20:00.006+08:00

Here’s the thing. I tried to come up with a serious posting that I have been meaning to touch on but every time I’m down with it, I’ll sure to hit a snag.

Since I’m not a quitter however, I went on and tried again, putting some serious thoughts into writing. After several (twice) failed attempts, I decided to quit.

So anyway, I’m currently in a very romantic mood. A groovy kind of feeling, y'know.

A little incident happened the other day was the sole reason for putting me in such corniness.

(And I swear you will not find any catch at the end of this entry)

Briefly.

Met a dear friend at one of me favourite mamak joints one night and as I had anticipated all along, she wanted a shoulder to cry on. She was in real mess. A complicated love story kind of mess.

Being a good Thelma, I did my utmost best to offer her some words of comfort. It actually worked. To be able to put a smile – albeit temporarily- back on her face, I consider that as shoulders well cushioned.

But who am I kidding, right?

Lets get real. It takes more than just a Thelma-wannabe to get her out of the deepshit.

I may be the greatest quadriplegic ever to set foot on a footrest but this quadriplegic man’s best is simply not good enough.

Any how, that little episode has left quite an impact on me. Sure, it has been quite a shitty ride (on wheelchair) but I’ve come a long way I should feel more thankful for what I have and blessed with nowadays.

A relatively healthy life(style), I own a Mercedes-Benz, a respectable job managing a boyband, influential politician who’s capable to boot and replace our current pee-am and most importantly, I have a girl friend that understand and loves me dearly for the person I am.

A little too corny for someone’s liking but I’m going ahead anyway, re-freshening my pledge to her I made some years back.

Mark my words, sweetheart. I’m staying true to you!

Told ya, no catch but a music video featuring me fav punk rock band, performing a corny tune.

Mardi Gras Up North

2008-08-05T01:40:00.007+08:00

Ah yes, the by-election. The next time you see a rainbow, you can bet the trail ends in Permatang Pauh.

It is like striking a jackpot, especially for living voters.

It may be a Pilihanraya Kecil but by no means it’s a small affair. With all the political bigwigs sure to throng in to try fish some votes, the timing couldn’t be more perfect than now to squeeze them to bits

For the disabled community, this chance is a must-grab. Go ahead, ask for a super-light weight, brand new Quickie. Who knows you might even end up with two.

But hey, I’m serious. Disabled persons who are yet to enjoy any form of financial aid shouldn’t find it hard to apply for any. While for those whose application is still pending, just go over to the nearest politician in sight and enlighten them of your problem. They’d be more than happy to cut the bureaucracy crap and speed up the process.

Its not an everyday thing one gets to channel his grouses directly to the powers-that-be. While the carnival is in town, one should at least demand for their rights to be looked into.

Yea and everyone would be thinking, its not as easy as telling them PP folks to do it.

First of all, it’s a mere suggestion. Secondly, nothing to lose but everything to gain and thirdly, them politicians will sure to oblige or someone will defecate on their Kompressor’s windscreen.

So do not fret. Demand!

Now here’s a drive initiated by our friend Anfield Devotee aka Craig Johnston aka Bala Ji to get people to register and in due course eligible to exercise their rights to vote.

I doubt there’ll be any snap election but by-elections at your own yard can be as near as just around the corner.

I mean, MPs and Aduns are humans too. And they too, could be raped in the ass tomorrow and die the day after. You just never know. Life and death is solely God’s business to decide.

It takes only a few minutes just to get you registered anyway, and soon your name will be on the electoral role, and as a living voter for that matter.

For those unregistered, spare a minute or 3 the next time you see a post office. Sign up and be counted.

And of course, if I get the break to stand in as one of the candidates for a parliamentary seat, your vote will count for nothing if it went to my opponent.

To male voters, they better watch their…err…step.

To lady voters meanwhile, vote for me or otherwise I swear I’ll trace your home and steal your white-cotton panties.

Disturbed- Down With The Sickness

2008-08-01T13:14:00.005+08:00

Oh hell, so much for wild and wicked weekend; damn bugs are having an orgy in my body system instead. Totally uninvited.

Just when I thought this weekend would be the best opportunity to unleash the party animal in me, the flu virus had to play a party-pooper, hence rule me out from attending an inaugural book club meeting.

The thing is, whenever I’m down with sickness, the last thing I’d do is seeking advice from the doctor. Think about it, this isn’t the first time I’m down with flu. All I ever get was the same set of medication. The same bitter shit.

Or maybe I could do this; since I’ll be going to the hospital anyway later (visiting my dear old grandma), I might as well look out for any ENT specialist walking up and down the alleyway, stop him and ask about my problem. I’m sure he’ll oblige because soon he’ll find out he’s treating a guy called Kerp, the greatest paper columnist there ever was...to be seeking treatment from him.

Then I can imagine he’s gonna say things like…

-Virus is in the air.

-Drink a lot of water.

-Your nostril is not in danger of potential Tenesmus because mucus keeps oozing out.

-Stop smoking because Nik Aziz says so.

-Eat a lot of veggies and starve yourself to die.

Then come back home Mom will be singing the same tune.

-no late night work.

-no cold water for the next few days

-no wild night out

-no loud music.

And I’d be like, no loud music?

Oookay, no point living then.

The Tenesmus

2008-07-30T21:20:00.003+08:00

What would you do when you’ve ran out of pornographic materials to drool on especially during the wee hours of the morning? As I found out, no better ways to fill your lonely hours than to look the word tenesmus up the wikipedia.

As everyone may have figured the meaning by now, I think when a dude suffers from one, he couldn’t be claiming that he was raped in the ass, could he?

This is nothing political but purely based on logic. My take is, when someone’s anus is screwed, say, by an obvious object, that will naturally opens up the anal canal wider for his turd to ease through. So if he was indeed being fucked in the butthole, he should be able to crap effortlessly. And he might be able to do it even by standing on his feet.

Whatever man. I think its better to leave this matter to the expert because I’m not a doctor, let alone an ass doctor.

Hey, but I think the word Tenesmus sounds pretty rockin’. Cool name for a rock band.

Or a boy band. Something like the Rasmus, only that Rasmus is a crappy rock band.

I think The Tenesmus will thrive better in the pop scene. Just need to gather a bunch of guys with a pretty-boy look, preferably with a six-pack torso, a singing ability as melodious as the Spice Girls and voila, they’ve got themselves a contract.

To make their first million bucks all they need is to corrupt an oldie number and they are well on track to be part of world’s wonders- the one-hit wonder.

So anyway, my current state of mind is totally untenesmus. I have been writing since Monday and all that ever comes out are pure crap...just like our nation's current political situation.

I Love Mondays

2008-07-28T01:44:00.004+08:00

Oh man, its only 1220am and I can barely open my eyes. The weariness is still very much felt, clouding my whole body system even after hours of afternoon siesta. Not gonna blame on the age factor, because I am still young and gorgeous but I believe its more like a wake-up call that I should go slow on my weekend’s routine-breaking shindigs.

Suffice to say my past weekends have not been short of activities. Invitations kept pouring in- dinners, reunions, lesbian orgies, bloggers get-togayther- and this round of weekend was no exception.

Time flies by when you’re having a good time but when you had a blast, you wish you could party on as if there’s no tomorrow.

Now that we’re well into the dreading start of the week, all the fun comes to a halt.

Its back to a dull, routine motion. Pressure starts mounting to get your job done and Friday seems like a century away.

Then we begin to moan, grumble and whinge on about everything that deems suck to one’s preference- Just because it’s a bloody Monday.

There in the ward meanwhile, we have someone dearly battling a dreadful Monday that will inevitably harm her body in some ways or another and here we moan for the workload which will in due course produces an income.

I mean, doesn’t sound right, does it?

It was only a couple of years ago when I gave a pal -with a respectable career, a salary comparable to a corrupted minister- some good piece of mind. He can go ahead and lust for all the good shit the world can offer but not swapping places with a quad like me so he could sleep through out the day and night.

No man, you wouldn't want that. A single ‘Amin’ to that and God could very well grant his wish and crippled his limbs at one stroke. And trust me, its not a pretty thing to be yearning for.

Now however, I’m guilty of that and a good reminder should snap me off from ultimately swallowing on my own words. Actually I’m culpable of everything under the sun, so its not a real surprise that I’m guilty of bitching mad at poor old Mondays.

Ungrateful bastards most of us are.

Flip-Flop

2008-07-24T01:43:00.004+08:00

Hey, I’ve got my notebook back. Nothing to shout about really as it’s still the same crappy old laptop, only minus the Trojans and shits like that, which of course is a good thing.

I shouldn’t be complaining, you know. I take some consolation that comes out of this whole virus-attack episode- that it was just an old laptop and not a Proton Perdana, or I may have to break my bank account (as well as few dozen others) just to get it repaired.

RM50k to fix a damn car. And we dumb fools are expected to buy this trumped-up story. Come on la datok, its your life-long dream to drive a benzo. Stop faking it and come out clean with your story. You’re nothing but a faker, man. A mother faker.

Ok, back to my virus-free laptop.

I seriously think its about time I change to a new one. But the timing couldn’t be as ghastly as now. Just when the cost of living is soaring high, this fucking thing just had to turn its back against me.

I’ve got some wonderful people reading my blog who came out with suggestions on how I could go about in replacing this old junk for a new one. I truly appreciate their ideas. They offered something substantial, and the fact that we’re mere blog acquaintance really speaks volume of their thoughtfulness.

But, I’ve already got a plan up my sleeveless Pagoda.

The lady-luck may not be smiling at me now but I truly believe there’s always a light at the end of every tunnel. For striking the right chord I managed to get a slot for a meeting with a certain VVIP.

No, its not Kery Jamaluddin. Whoever, Its very much on the card and I have yet to utilize it.

The best part is, the ball is in my court to name her (yes, it’s a she!) the date and time for the meeting- at my convenience! That’s the flip side to it.

Now for the flop side to this whole good shit –

I don’t have the guts to bloody do it. The thought of calling her up simply freaks me like hell my balls shrink up without a trace left in the scrotal bag.

But I know I’m gonna have to do it eventually. I wanted this so much and will make the most of this little precious time she has for me.

What I need is to put on a thick face, be done with all the protocols and get down straight to the point and forward my request for a state-of-the-art notebook.

In the mean time, I’m just hoping the testicles will return to its place and gather my guts in full-force soon before I pick up that damn phone and start dialing.

Raden Galoh

2008-07-22T14:00:00.004+08:00

It was her birthday on Monday and when she was supposed to be out dining with her colleagues, letting her hair down celebrating this meaningful occasion, instead she was greeted with an upsetting news- a cancer relapse that has now spread on a few more areas of her body.

Monday couldn’t get more suck than to receive such devastating news as this, especially the victim being dearly to us. In this case, me.

Raden Galoh, or fondly Kak D to yours truly, has been an inspiration to most of us who are either direct or indirectly linked to her blog, as well as her faithful readers.

Right from the beginning when she was first diagnosed back in 2004, she endured the battle heroically. Survived the first ordeal but unfortunately another one awaits.

I know I shouldn’t be fretting. Kak D’s a fighter, and an admirable Srikandi at that. With the immense inner spiritual strength she possesses, I know she’ll pull through.

We are all with you Kak D. our prayers will be with you always!

Change your lifestyle: Dump Proton for Merc

2008-07-21T11:39:00.002+08:00

Hello.

I know I’m on borrowed computer (still) but the temptation of forwarding some piece of my mind regarding the Mercedes fiasco in the east-coast state was just simply overwhelming.

First read it at Kata Tak Nak and Rocky and I thought its gotta be another hearsay until this morning when the MB came out with the statement naturally to defend the state government’s move.

Apparently the move was made after they’ve studied every angle and the most frugal way to pamper the state’s exco and senior official members is to, GET THIS, buy them an E200 Kompressor each, which totalled up to RM3.43m for 14 units.

Riiiiiight.

How in the world will this ‘clever’ idea save any cost?

Oh well, it does make sense, doesn’t it…to the MB at least.

After all you can’t expect the excos to turn down on such move now that they’ve got a Mercedes Kompressor each to show off. Besides, its good enough keep their mouth shut.

The MB cited an example where one fella had to fork out RM50000 just for repair during his 3 years driving a Perdana, and hence the need to switch to Merc.

Shit man, did this guy actually use the Perdana to drive or what?

Here I have family member and a few friends driving a Perdana V6 and trust me, all of them have been using the same vehicle for more than 6 years now and apart from minor repairs the cars are very much in top-notch condition.

Get real mr MB. If Perdana- or any cars for that matter- are well maintained and taken care of, the car can last a life-time.

If the MB thinks local cars are crap, I think the excuses given are even crappier.

Rumour Mongering

2008-07-17T02:36:00.004+08:00

Is it true, that Ameno and Past has finally kissed, fondled and ultimately merged?

I received this piece of news from the most reliable source that anyone could ever get their hands on – circulated email

According to the sender - a very respectable and influential man whom I cant quite recall his name - he emphasised that the much talk-about meeting between the two parties had in fact taken place in Thailand and even provided what he claimed as hard-proof.

I am totally buying this story, man. I mean, why not. It looks so genuine and convincing. You judge for yourself and tell me if I’m wrong.

Kihkihh…

Ok I should just shut the hell up and quit writing for a while.

The latest political development has in a way put me in the spot I feel a little confused of what to make out of all these. Maybe I should just stay away from politics all together and start focussing on my future plans, like getting a federal datukship for example. I’ve got it all planned on print and stored it up in my c-drive.

But first, I need my laptop back.

Dragging week ahead: The bad shit

2008-07-14T12:10:00.004+08:00

Ok here’s another shit, alas a bad shit. I am now back on my sister-in-law’s machine. No prize in guessing what happened to that crappy old laptop of mine.

What’s bothering my state of mind the most currently is how the hell am I to earn a living now that the bloody laptop has gone totally round the bend. As I stressed prior to this, the fucking thing has been my rice cooker for quite sometime now. Unfortunately it has gone mad and now my bread & butter is pretty much at stake.

I’ve got tons of shit to do and the fucking virus just had to play its game at the worst time possible.

Unlike many, I’ve been very dependant as far computer repairing goes. Now that it wont be around for quite a while, I may have to seek my in-law’s kindness to at least let me keep this till I finish off with my weekly article. Not that she minds but I believe she has her own shitty work to get them done too.

I’ve gone through deeper shit, this couldn’t be so bad, right? I wish.

This has always been the story of my life so far. Just when I thought everything seems to fall into places, faeces and vomit sure to be thrown in together into the mixing bowl just to wreck and mess the party up.

If there’s any consolation, well, I am still breathing.

Here’s to another crappy crap crap week ahead. Hooray to life!

* Any rich blogger/reader out there care to donate? I'll sell my dignity and dance to the tune of Las Ketchup for your sole enjoyment. Anything man...anything for a laptop!

Good Shit

2008-07-11T11:07:00.004+08:00

They were one of the coolest things to ever embrace the youth of the nation back during its peak in circa 92-94. When most teenagers were into post-Justice Metallica, some of us kids found a punk rock band much cooler to dig on, with a local flavour.

Proud to shout out I was one of those kids who would tag along with the band around town performing in underground shows, most notably at Live Centre together with the usual suspects namely The Pilgrims, The Splatters, Subculture, Lovely Ugly Carnivals, Chronic Mass and a few friends from down under; Force Vomit, Stompin’ Ground and Swirling Madness to name a few.

Now they’re back in the news and this time the whole nation turns their head, amid for the wrong reason- the legendary Carburetor Dung.

Hold on, did I say for the wrong reason? You bet. The band (with a new line-up) played a set which was part of a rally organised by the opposition coalition, so naturally bad press from the MSM was something everyone could foresee it coming.

Apart from the incident last week however, I cant recount any other untoward occurrence as far as this band are concerned. Well, not to my knowledge at least.

But I will not budge from what I have always thought of them. Carburetor Dung will as usual go on doing their business at what they’re always best at- rocking the stage.

They may be famous now with their bahasa track Mari Nyanyi Menjilat but they’ll forever be remembered as the band responsible for producing some of the most anthemic punk rock numbers, one of them being the sing-along crowd-favourite Boohoo Clapping Song, featured in their debut Songs For Friends album way back in 1993.

Who cares that if it has never managed to climb up the local chart. The kids dug it, the airwaves can fucking kiss asses full of Dung.

Politics aside, to Joe Kidd and the lads, I tip my hat!

Boo Hoo Clapping Song - Carburator Dung

Will sell my spine for a new laptop

2008-07-10T00:06:00.003+08:00

Strike? What strike? Someone asked me if I had taken the cue from other bloggers to boycott all the political skirmishes clouding our nation lately.

Then why the long hiatus, echoed another friend.

Read my fucking blog la dei.

As it is now I’m still to know when exactly my laptop will be ready. Not that there’s any problem with this one that I’m on now, but its just not the same. Its like when you are so used to cuddling your spouse and suddenly you are fondling a different person against your will.

So anyway, I was at the blog house last week and one of the sponsors, LG, had initiated some sort of a contest where we are required to reveal our darkest secret through our blog and link it back to them. The best kept secret spotted by the organiser will walk away with their latest hand phone product and a night’s spend with the LG Girls or something.

Or was it? It was too noisy I can barely hear what the emcee (Tony) was trying to tell us exactly.

Hey, not that I’m participating but if I did I could be winning the contest hands-down. I’ve got too many secrets by revealing the worst-kept would hand me the grand prize.

Like that night right… while shaking hands with Erra Fazira, my eyes were actually focusing on her boobs. She may notice it but as I said; its only the worst-kept.

And later on, all along the conversation I had with this one sweet lady who came up to me, I couldn’t make out who she was, right up till now!

Ok seriously I thought it’d easy but its not. By telling the whole world your secrets it may in a way, jeopardise your career, relationship and even get you into trouble with the authority.

Here’s a bold truth; I have indeed, committed a crime or ten…

Ahh………

A Quickie

2008-07-07T14:28:00.002+08:00

I know what people will exactly say if I told them my computer has been struck by some notorious Trojan virus- that I’m a smut-addict.

There is some truth in it but I swear to God that wasn’t the actual reason how this nasty bug had found its way into my hard-disk. Without elaborating much, there I was innocently doing some work via email trying to make a living when it happened. And I was like, yay, great. There goes my rice cooker (periuk nasi).

Not all is lost yet, hopefully. Not sure how long can I hold on to my sis-in-law’s laptop that I’m currently using and typing on but I’ve got my machine sent to fix the problem. It may take a few days or even longer.

Hopefully everything will be back in place soon. Last week was a complete misery that it has in a way taken today’s blues away.

My apologies to all as I may not be able to go blog-whoring for the next 24 hours at least

Rancangan akan disambung semula selepas masalah teknikal dapat diatasi. Harap maklum.

Seasonal Grandmother's Story

2008-07-04T00:24:00.008+08:00

Bloody hell this has gone way too far. I REALLY HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF ALL THESE HIDEOUS LIES.

The current fiasco is way too bitter to chew on. Why the hell everyone should believe in hearsay is a real puzzle. And now people tend to believe that a ridiculous amount of cash were involved as part of whatever fuck the deals are going on currently.

Supporters from both sides of the fence cant be fooled by all the talks any longer…

ITS ALL RUMOURS. NOTHING ELSE BUT A TRUMPED-UP STORY. WE ARE SICK AND TIRED OF ALL THESE FABRICATIONS CREATED BY CERTAIN QUARTERS OBVIOUSLY WITH EVIL OBJECTIVES UP THEIR SLEEVE.

My advice to those irresponsible bastards is to stop all these bullshit and totally lay off of him.

UNTIL ITS OFFICIALLY PROVEN HE HAS INDEED DONE THE DESPICABLE ACT...

EMMANUEL ADEBAYOR REMAINS A GUNNER!

In the mean time, Barca and Milan can kiss a certain frenchman's derriere!

kihkihhhhhh...

Screwed

2008-07-03T02:46:00.002+08:00

Internet users subscribed to streamyx in my area have been having trouble surfing the net for more than a couple of days now. I thought it would be fully recovered by today but no, loading a page earlier this evening took longer than my usual dumping session.

But seriously, nothing can top the misery I had to endure last night. Talking about a bad hair day, or night or whatever hell, it was by far the crappiest in recent months.

The bad internet connection was dreadful enough but that’s fine by me. I can live without surfing the net for a day or two. Besides, what can get worse right?

Wrong. Soon enough I discovered my Astro’s remote control had gone caput. I was so sure it wasn’t the batteries as It was only a few weeks back that I had it replaced. This may not be a big deal to you lot as the channel can still be switched manually but not me la joe, I was already in bed by then.

The worst is still to come- the Astro was last tuned to Playhouse Disney channel! Darn kids…another round of Barney and I’ll go barmy.

Right. So no smut to drool on nor any good programs to watch. And programs on terrestrial tv at best are as good as Bloomberg tv on Astro, only works good for those suffering from insomnia. In the end I decided to call it a day.

With the current political hullabaloo I don’t think I have missed much anyway. Some news (literally) blows, (back) entries on one 23yo dude are posted on many blogs and all of a sudden the fuel issue died down. At the end of the day the rakyat are still being screwed, just like that dude’s ass.

In the mean time I could do with a couple more of good, deep slumber. Try this (at home and office) and you’ll feel like weekend comes sooner than it usually does.

Freak Show?

2008-06-30T13:17:00.002+08:00

So our country is currently very much in deep political turmoil. Blowing up this, back-door penetration that and whatever fuck else.

Malice and more malice!

Its all about hatred. Every Malaysian politicians have abundance of that permanently clouding their heart. Its becoming part of their flesh and blood.

The latest being a racist-sow from Perak.

Should we really give a shit about what she had uttered when we always claim to be civilized and cultured? Getting into this will only endorse her inane mentality and automatically pull us down at her level. She’s a cunt, so lets just leave her at that.

Now anyway, no doubt I’ll be part of the audience, waiting in full anticipation how interestingly all the dramas will unfold. The excitement that engages our attention when the plot thickens. Laughs at one’s silliness, shed tears for someone’s misfortune. The shows will be without any affirmative ending.

These are all political games. One’s gain at the expense of one’s downfall. That’s politics for you.

That leaves us in the same puddle of mud we’re shoved into, living our lives making ends meet just to keep putting food on the table and fill up our car tanks. The only difference is, this shit aint no stage show. Pinch yourself hard and you’ll feel the pain…its fucking real, man.

Sabah

2008-06-27T02:16:00.001+08:00

Hey, I was just thinking right…now that the federal government are focusing their attention heavily on Sabah, maybe this is the best opportunity for the disabled community there to come out and demand for their rights to be seriously looked into. With all the fracas currently surrounding the state, the timing couldn’t be more perfect than now. Just stick it in and push your luck, baaa…

Unless of course an MP/adun dies. But wishing for a by-election wouldn’t be so nice would it, its as good as praying for someone to fook off and die. Or whatever.

So anyway, it feels like eons ago since the last time we enjoyed a weekend. Now that I’ve got all the job done, I don’t see any reason to wait till everyone clocks out of their dreary cubicles before starting mine. Nope, no time for that man…kihkih…

So long, losers!

Free Goodies

2008-06-25T18:08:00.000+08:00

Since I had all the time in the world last night, I thought its high time to catch up on some latest movies. No I did not go to any cinemas near-by. I mean, in order to change our lifestyle, it is not a good idea to watch movies in cinema when one can actually catch 2 films via DVD at a much cheaper price.

In a way what they are trying to tell us is to be frugal and support the pirates!

But I had something better up my sleeve. Instead of parting ways with a few bucks I earned, I decided to steal.

Yea you heard me right. I was at a friend’s house the other day and he had quite an impressive collection. So while he was bragging away how he can get DVD copies at the lowest price, I slipped in a few pieces into my bag without even looking at the title. As long as its free, I couldn’t care any less about the title. After all in these trying times the last thing you need is being choosy.

Then came back and analyzed over what I had looted.

There was The Hulk 2, Fantastic Four, a couple of latest Malay/Indon horror flicks and a copy of Japanese Upskirt compilation. Not bad.

And since there was no footie last night, I braved myself and went ahead to watch one of the two horror films called Congkak, one of strings of Malaysia’s latest horror flicks.

Not about to do a movie review here but I thought the movie wasn’t that bad, literally a movie to shout (and scream) about.

Well, poor those people involved in the making of this movie. No doubt there are those who would prefer to catch this one on a bigger screen with an imposing surround sound system, hence the production people makes some money out of these jackasses. But equally there are people like me who wouldn’t mind leading a more cheapskate way either to borrow/steal or deal with street peddlers that could save a few bucks.

Imagine how much profit they can make if it had not been for the recent essential goods crisis.

Sometimes by decree, its perfectly fine to be selfish.

New Cabinet (and Chairs)

2008-06-23T10:09:00.005+08:00

In one of my entries last week, Someone, or possibly a robotic spammer had left a list of possible cabinet line-up for Pakatan Rakyat if ever they took the office in the near future. I stressed on that due to Mr Lim Kit Siang’s inclusion in the list. I mean, he wont be sticking around that much in a distance future, right? the last thing Malaysia need is another Lee Kuan Yew, or a Mr. Burns-like centenarian to get us out of any economic deep shit.

The usual suspects were unsurprisingly included - Anwar, Teresa, Jeff Ooi, Azmin, Teng, Sivarasa and even Farish whoeverhellheis- besides the DAP man himself.

YAWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN…

Nice try chief, but you left me out. Whether it was done on purpose or not, YOU…BELADI...LEFT…ME…OUT.

In case you didn’t know, I’ve been working hard, plotting my way up the political ladder through secret meetings with Yong Teck Lee, the founder cum CEO of YTL Corporation or something. Whatever.

What he and his party did had, to certain extent, widened the road in making ways for a new face to lead Malaysia, and that face belongs to me. I’m edging ever closer of seeing my dream becoming a reality while at one fell swoop hijacking Anwar’s ambitious attempt.

Once I’m in power, I’ll make sure half the cabinet post be taken up by my cronies.

Chong the quadriplegic veteran from Bentong will become the deputy PM uncontested. Then I’ll appoint my buddy Zulkafli to handle the finance ministry because he’s always broke. While another best pal Zahidi will take the Works ministry portfolio due to his wheelchair’s regular need of a repair.

Here’s the full crippled cabinet list, followed by yours truly’s desperate need of catching up with some sleep.

PM- ME.
DPM/Minister Mentor- Chong Tuck Meng
Finance- Zulkafli
Transport- Kalimathru (deceased)
Law- Jef
Sports- Lim (not related to LKS)
Works- Zahidi
Defense- Insp Syukri
Information- Subra
Home- Nigella Lawson
Agriculture-Husni
Foreign- Zulaffendi
Health- Me
Tourism- Felipe Massa
Technology- Firdaus
Education- Weezer

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This is a dedication to all my wheelchair comrades, a category of friend who sticks around and be there for one another through thick and thin, rain or shine, good and bad times. Unlike some worthless, self-centered relatives, they’re great buddies to a certain degree I regard as my own flesh and blood.