Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Breaking News

The title says it all, literally.

The chair's backrest, which I bought some years back for a whopping 1200 bucks is finally showing its old age. There suddenly appears to have a couple of cracks on each sides of it which inevitably means it could break into 3. This is a real big blow and could affect my everyday life. Can an MP help me out? I would love to believe so.

In local entertainment front, my all-time favourite actress, the hotter-than-hot Jasmine Hamid is now a divorcee MILF. She and her former fucker went through all the shitty court process and today their marriage is officially over. Can't believe she's single now. I'm quite sure guys will be lining up to try their luck on marrying this doll. Oh well...pick me, pick me...hehehe...

On a lighter note, our Parliament House has been dissolved today. This technically means we're now government-less. I have been wanting to say this and couldn't find any better timing to let it out of my chest. So here goes...

Fuck the government.

Ahh...Such bliss.

29 comments:

Zawi said...

Kerp,
The caretaker government is in charge now. Who is the caretaker government? BN. Same difference from before hahahaha. Hope they will get the shock of their life in the coming GE.

cakapaje said...

Salam bro,

Do pardon my ignorance. But the only MILF I know are the people from Moro Islamic Liberation Front. Surely, she's not one of them already?

Kata Tak Nak said...

As for Jasmine, please forget all hopes of landing her. Lingam just got me a ticket for 2 to New Zealand. Soi Lek just gave me some leftovers Viagras. I may need them you know and Lah recommended a nice place to sleep.

constant drama said...

Amen to that brother!!

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Pak Z,

Caretaker gomen consist of the same bunch of people? And I thought Tuanku Mizan is our acting PM. That’s a nice thought. Even better permanently…hehehe


Salam Tuan Shah,

Aiseh…errm. Aku nak cakap pon segan lah…hehhehe…wiki it up.

One thing’s for sure, this milf has nothing to do with the separatist group.


Cikgu,

Eh, you’re a fan too?

if that fella to recommend you a nice place to sleep, judging from photos I’ve seen, to him any place is a nice place…heheheh


CDO,

Yes, amin, amin yarobbal alamin that Jasmine would pick me. hihi…

bailey said...

kerp, kalau jasmine pick u, pinky nak letak mana? he he.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Bailey, sisterrrr...

thank you for pinching me out of my useless fantasy. reality is bliss!

Tinesh said...

Hahaha!! Fuck the gomen!!! I also thot that the Agong would be the caretaker..

Jasmine pick me!!! I'm single AND available!!!

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

T,

nice try but for the sake of that helloween song you downloaded for me, am not gonna mention anything about your girl in Penang.

oh, oops...

Ok, jasmine, pick Tinesh.

anfield devotee said...

"Fuck The Govt" (???)

Sorry bro, its us who has been fucked over . . .

Time fer it to stop.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Bala,

lets gather all rakyat and sodomise them G then...hehehe...

*eh, them DIC are on the verge of taking over from the yanks. could that spell the end of rafa-lution?

anfield devotee said...

Sad to say, bro. Rafalution tak jadi la. Gaffer has become a sad caricature of Houllier's Last Stand . . .

Fooking degil fer the fooking sake of it.

Another season, another wasted year . . . sigh . . .

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

bro, remember evans-houllier combo? ok maybe that was a flop but it could workout with rafa as half of another possible co-managers.

cheer up bala, you guys are still very much in facup and champs league. that would make up for whatever shit's happened this season so far.

the season's far from over anyway. we gooners are still very cautious, taking one game at a time.

tokasid said...

Salam Kerp:

1- Your MUST make one specific entry about the 'chair' and we will help you spread to the candidate of Kelana Jaya preferably BN. They might you 3 of those which will last for 10 years. And on top of that why not try them for a brand new wheely too.
If there is no takers, then I and che'gu will ask Mydin to help out. Wgat say you.

2- Jasmine....dah janda? Ada nombor telifon dia tak? Or e-mail ke? Bukan apa aku nak jadi broker utk che'gu saja.

3-Caretaker gomen. Now this is actually a misleading name to call. Its basically the same mafia before dissolution of the Parliament.The same joker which use the same vehicles to campaign for their own parties and coalition at our expense.Its the rakyats money the use to campaign vie the TV stations and radios. All the advertisements they made through Finas or KekWa is from our money. And all the kain pelikat,kain bateks RM 50.00(minimum) and their election allowances to their party workers are our money.

Caretaker pungkoq depa!(Astaghfirullah..aku mencarut rupanya.LOL!)

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Salam doc,

This is the reality. Them MPs will only help out if this case to appear on tele. They wont waste their hectic schedule on a lousy backrest.

And this caretaker gomen business thing, why cant we have the Agong as our leader for a change? I mean seriously, that would be nice come to think of it.

*I heard of jasmine’s divorce after watching news on the parliament dissolution. No telepon dia aku takde. But kalo ada, I’d sure to keep it to myself. kalo bagi cikgu, he'd kidnap her to new zealand.

heheheheh….

muteaudio said...

Bro,
"Them MPs will only help out if this case to appear on tele."
"ehem ehem...." clear throat

I agree with doc, this is the chance u salah guna them politician for 'personal' gain. They've been doing it on daily basis what.....

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Mute,

yes, couldnt ask for a better person to get my crippled face on tele. but i swear the fishing trip was the last time i went out. will keep you informed dont worry.

eh, tapi kan bro, you can come over and witness how an OKU lead his daily routine. you're always welcomed i promise. just make a date. On?

Tinesh said...

Tinesh is currently riding solo man..NO more girl in penang..So jasmin can keep, i mean pick me

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

T, so you're into ibu gula now huh? you'd address her as kakak while making out. hehehehe...you sick bastard.

constant drama said...

No. You BOTH are sick bastards.

I'm just sayin.....

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

eh, but at least we're less sick than some bastardised paedos cum pilots...

kahkahhhh...

blackpurple @ jowopinter said...

KERAjaan. Achummm! Terbersin pulak!

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

muahahaha...tersedak saudara DNA kita kat hutan.

Tinesh said...

HAHAHA hopefull i dont say kakak la...But ibu gula is good wat..At least I get stuff done and paid for me man..Wich guy wudnt want dat u tell me?

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Ms CDO,

for the record i played no part in any of the statement above.

hehehehehe...

Mat Salo said...

Oi brader, long story was traveling, samapai kapai internet kaput so I missed lots of your posts.

Sorry to hear about the chair, man. Hope you get a replacement soon.

BTW, particularly enjoyed the Feb. 8 post bro. I hear you loud and clear and hope you ditch this Jay MILF and go for the real thing.

Betoi ke that PP (Peado Pilot) tu anak director ACA? And if so, will he get off scot-free?

You and I and all the bloggers here ain't the ones that's sicko bro. The sickos are now out of the Parliament and the ex-heads and CJ's of the judiciary

Farkem bro...RIIIGHHHT ON! But in reality like what ARSE Devotee said, we're the ones getting farked.

P.S. I'm with Tuan Shah. Goddeng, MILF to apa?

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

MS,

Where have you been la geng? Yes, its been a millennium since you updated your blog.

Always a pleasure hearing you from the swamp. But no way my fantasy can get rid of miss Jay MILF…hehehe…its free!

Not sure about the pilot aka child-molester being a ACA’s sone but whoever his dad is, he ought to feel disgraceful.

Eh, when are you coming back to civilization? When to meet again la friend? Hopefully soon man.

*backrest aku dah jahit pakai dawai. 2nd cost around rm900. selagi boleh jahit ke, paku ke, patri ke, I’ll do it.


*MILF- aiyaa..so naive la you people. malu la to explain here....wiki it up la...hahaha

thanks MS. so nice to hear from you again.

Anonymous said...

I just want to say FUCK THE GOVERNMENT! I did a song about it like to here it???

http://youtube.com/watch?v=ji1idO2dZKA

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

yup, good shit man. was that fiddy?