10 ways for a political party to redeem itself and make it more relevant and appealing to the masses, particularly today’s young generation.
1. Get rid of all the deadwoods. They’re a pest and a liability not just to the party, but the world population as a whole.
2. Prohibit a certain guy who is a known dumbass from contesting the number two post that could possibly pave way for him to take over the top seat. The last thing the youth needs is to gamble on the future by having a stupid asshole running the show.
3. Racist must be sacked immediately. Too many assholes will only dent the party’s credibility deeper.
4. Youth wing should do without old geezers at the helm.
5. See-through attire for the Puteris. A sure bet to appeal to the male (and some female) masses.
6. Pink trousers for the youth wing. If that does not attract much attention, I don’t know what will.
7. Rope in the real deal clowns. As the saying goes; leave it to the pros.
8. Money politics must go. 200 bucks is downright an insult unless…the bribery fetches up to rm10k per vote.
9. Treat all members like VIP. Everybody gets to cramp the exclusive room and join the orgy with their older counterparts. Sure more to sign up.
10. Give me a multi-million Ringgit project and I’ll reveal point number 10.
The weirdness is getting out of hand. In my mind I picture a gnome-like creature taking over the hot seat come March. But come to think of it, better goblins than a mere puppet.