Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Green Campaign

Believe it or not but once upon a time at some stage of my life, I had seriously thought of joining the Greenpeace. Well, not exactly one of those guys in 2-sitter canoe stalling and blocking the pathway of a colossal Queen Victoria-like ship, protesting against the hunting of humpback whales. I’m not that ambitious by the way.

In my mind, I imagined to be something like, say, a tree-hugger. A tree-hugger who cant bear the sight of a logger.

However during one of the trips up the KL Tower I noticed we are actually surrounded by jungles and I thought hey, fuck the future generation. We have abundance of tree still that I hope the trees will only be wiped out by development once I’m already on my deathbed.

So naturally I ditched the idea until recently when a certain greedy developer, backed by a certain party decided to milk in some cash at the expense of mother nature and in the process destroying a lake surrounded by lush greenery.

That was when I renewed my ambition and play a more active role in making sure the environment we live in is breathable.

So when the World Environmental Day got underway last week, and being fully aware I should play some part due to my status as an environmentalist, I got down to work albeit unconventionally.

Planting tree sucks ass. Planting trees are either for kids or politician posing for the camera and all the boring shit. Get bent, guys. Should have tried something more unique.

I on the other hand, did something original.

When I needed to smoke, I locked myself in the room with all the windows tightly shut.

I only flushed the WC after the fourth time taking my leak.

If had wanted to take a dump, I would have made sure I’d take another 3 more times before flushing down all the crap. But glad I didn’t need to do any serious business that day. Conserving water is also part of saving the environment incase you didn’t know yet.

I blew my nose with only 2 pieces of tissue paper used throughout the day. The trick is to fold it over and over again until every inch of the tissue paper is used. Imagine if thousand of people practice on this same method, we could at least save one tree.

I know, some may say its too small a contribution and how tiny a difference it would make.

The question should be this instead. As a citizen of the Earth, what have YOU done on your part?


Anba said...'s my contribution...

fer 30 yrs of my life i seldom have used motorbike, car coz i didn't have one...until recently i bought a car..that one also dah pinjam pd brother..

I used to walk and take public transport...although our public transport system sucks big time...
i remember the first time they introduced intrakota replacing the minibus to segambut ...that day
i just came bck frm ipoh the journey on the bus just took 2hrs and 15 was waiting behind kotaraya for the no 63 bus to go 2 segambut n...waited like fer the bus for like over 1 hours plus...and imagine this is the first day they are introducing
the bus service
previously with mini bus... u dont have to wait fer more than 20 mins..
i guess this what they call progress
I used to walk from Uni Malaya to Angkasapuri to take the KTM komuter...then walk from the Segambut Station to me house too. did this just to jimat duit coz it cost me rm1.20 if i took bus plus lrt could cost me rm3 and above

Bro.. last time i could easily walk from Sogo,jln MAsjid india to sungai wang plaza...then KLCC...hehehe
I dun SMoke either ..saves money a lot and clean air

And i have successfully minimized my methane contribution thru me arse..i use my mouth now... maybe thats y breath smells like ...shit kot hahaha

i guess i dun live much of life either.. work eet sleep dun use aircond coz cant afford thats y..
Bathe only once a day to save water...until my roomate complaint
eet less rice...
they say less is more...just like nothing is something...hehehe
Adios Amigo...

wanshana said...

I used to keep the engine running and the aircond on whilst waiting to fetch my kids from school.

Now, I turned everything off, and bake myself in the car : ala-ala having sauna la kot. Hopefully can kill 2 birds with one stone - not only can I contribute to all the environmental causes, but also, I might shed some kilos off me in the "sauna". Hahaha! (I wished...)

P/S : Instead of using two tissues for the entire day, why don't you get a hankie or two? Better still, wipe everything using your sleeves la, Kerp?! Hahaha! (But, of course, make sure YOU wash them yourself la after that!!)

Pi Bani said...

Green campaign? OK, raya tahun ni baju raya warna hijau.... hehehe...

Eh, I plant all sorts of trees lah around my home! (without having to pose for the camera lah like 'em politicians...)

wanshana said...

And Kerp,

Just to add - wash them hankies and sleeves WITHOUT using detergents some more, you know?! :)

Anonymous said...

hey...not good enough lah, flush the big business after 4 go baru saves more water!! me ah...very hopeless lah, not shy to admit...BUT i've got tons of trees at home, is that contributing, I dont smoke..that's contributing :) MK

Bernard said... bout not flushing after the big doo doo at all. Instead, you fooking scoop dem nasties out and use it to fertilise Mother Earth or dem plants those 2-faced politician just planted. So in a methaphoric kind of way, you could say you just crapped on the bastard...

PS. was a fee paying member of Greenpeace in my student days. Sum total of my contribution to the cause? F@#k all other than the annual fee!

Kata Tak Nak said...

From what I know Greenpeace is filled with braless chicks who are easy lays. Are you sure thats not the main reason you wanted to join Greenpeace?

anfield devotee said...

chew tobacco instead of smoking?

waterlily said...

Chew tobacco hahaha.

Smoker...ada berani cuba?

Mungkin ini salah satu petua berhenti merokok di samping menjadikan kita sang pencinta alam


Bernard said...

Yeah man...chew tobacco to give up smoking! Was at a cigar rolling demo once & the guy asked us to take a small bit of the tobacco to chew. Man! My head was spinning like a gasing on steriods within minutes & the taste was god awful.

classyadele said...

my greatest gripe is the unnecessary use of plasticbags....i just can't "stand" using too many's quite "painful" seeing huge amounts of wasted plasticbags...i know, funny that I'm humanising plasticbags..But it's true. Since being in NZ, also seriously picked up the art of recycling - and actually taking this into consideration when i go shopping (eg. buying things in boxes, esp if I can flatten the box after that, instead of things packed in polysterene packs...buying refills instead of new bottles of cream/shampoo,etc.).

cakapaje said...

Salam kerpie,

Well, I think I contribute heck of a lot more than you do. You see, the world is filled with people lacking energy and who are constantly tired because many, either have to work more than 1 job, or are walking the streets searching for one! So, for them, I sleep a lot.

ps. Oops! I hope palalah won't put me in ISA for doing his job.

Tinesh said...

Well i think i wana start using nicotine patches la..In a way it cuts down my cigarette intake and no smoke..

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Anba da Man,

Fine, you’ve contributed more.

You know, its been a while since I had a taste of public transport. In fact it was during the early days of intrakota that I took last. It sucks ass back then and it didn’t surprise me it sucks big time today. The numerous of promises to improvise public transport still remain as that, mere promises.

*sometimes some shit needs to be released, how unpleasant the outcome may be…hehehehe…

*aircond nowadays is a necessity for me la bro.

kak shana!

And may I add another one- when your engine is turned off, you get to save some precious fuel!

And all these ideas you gave me…hehehehe…I used to do that back when I was kid…right till I turned 24…hahahhahaha…

*my typical home attire has always been the pagodas…all sleeveless…or else I wouldn’t mind taking your suggestion into serious consideration…hehhehhehe

kak Pi,

that’s the difference la between you and those jerks. You plant trees all year-round. These fellas only plant tree during the world environmental day.


that’s what I said actually. After the 4th go then only flush…hahaha…yea, I guess everyone has somehow contributed something to the benefit of mother nature, but equally destroyed it.


Ok I admit, you people have better and crazier ideas how one can save the environment…yours is the most practical la so far just becos we might just get to defecate and them politician will have to scoop our doodie…hehehe…good shit this, man.
*you were once an official member of Greenpeace la, in other words…haha!


Oh yeah…uncharacteristically this one somehow slipped off my mind. I mean, how could I not remember those braless hippie chics?? Especially those parading naked protesting against the use of animal fur…you just gotta love street demos man…hehehe

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Bala ji,

Do we have the chewable tobacco here? I’ve tried some Beatle nuts and I crapped 7 times that day.

Kak mar!

Tak berani la akak. Kunyah sireh pond ah nak termuntah ni kana pa lagi. Tapi kita masih lagi boleh jaga alam sekitar dengan hanya hisap rokok dalam bilik sensorang. Tak kacau orang dan tak kacau udara…hehehehe…

*nanti bila saya dah blog tentang puisi tu saya sms akak…thanks.


If It ever crossed my mind to give up on fags, I’ll skip everything that taste shitty to my taste bud. PERIOD. If you can literally chew on sireh then you shouldn’t have qualms chewing on tobaccos.

Hey there classyadele!

That’s the difference between us and them kiwi fellas. Ever wondered why NZ is clean and beautiful? Here on the other hand, Malaysians tends to use plastic bags like nobody’s business and the nationwide recycling drive is nothing more than just, well, a mere campaign. We only show we care on the WE Day which comes annually. For the next 364 days we’re back doing the same shit.

Hey, thanks for crossing over. will definitely check out the link provided. should be an interesting read.

Shah my man,

That should be it la bro…we should change our lifestyle and sleep more. less water used, less fuel burnt, and less sound pollution if one talks a lot…hehehehe…


I swear if you quit smoking I’ll get some gangsters to beat the crap out of you till you pick up the bad habit again.

Salt & Turmeric said...

kerpie, always the tmi! lol.

as for me, iv cut down my smoking. really, no kidding one. iv also bot the blue ikea bag for future shopping and moving closer to workplace to reduse gas consumption. ok lah tu kan? lol.

Raden Galoh said...

hi bro...

we rejected the idea of installing water heater and air-conditioners in our house... so it's darn cold water for morning shower.. wanna warm water, boil the water in the kettele and pour it into the tub in the bathroom...hehehehe

nobody can smoke in my house, not even my heavy-smokers brothers, i threw away ashtrays or anything that looks like one... rejected the plan to buy a motorbike (mind you, I can ride one...) and instead ride the bicycles...until recently the tyres punctured...

trees? got alot at it, palm tree, coffee, meranti, cengal...weehhh...i stay in a kampung la bro... come over you, tree-hugger and hug the tree of your choice!

am so inspired with your high spirit ni...go kerpie..go kerpie...

Anonymous said...

Darl, i saw ur article in MM today :)

Daphne Ling said...


You trying to drown is it? Smoking with windows shut? Good for the environment, bad for you. My contribution? I don't smoke! ;)

I also carry cloth bags (Mob saw my Body Shop cloth bag and said I'm too environmentally friendly) as much as possible, and if need to use plastic bags, I try and squeeze as many things into one as possible...

I can't name all the little things lar...

BUT, Small things only lar me...=)

Kerp (Ph.D) said...


You sure you’ve cut down? Bcos that’s what I normally get from my smoker friends…hehehe…I would love to believe I have too…too bad nobody can lie to oneself…

Kak D,

Eh, but nowadays air-conditioner is a necessity la akak. Living in concrete jungle makes the heat unbearable at times. But maybe its much cooler over that end with all the trees surrounding your house.

I don’t mind mandi pakai air biasa. Have never bathe with hot water. I think air paip is fresher kot…hehehe…

*insyaAllah one day sampai jugak your house but will make sure I’ve had enough puffs before I entered your house…hehehehe…

cik anon,

eh, don’t tell everyone la…hehehe…malu.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Yo D!

Small contri from everyone can make a huge different in making the earth a better place to live in. I believe this was what the entry was all about. I too, believe I haven’t done much but as long the awareness is in everyone’s mind, that should be good enough.

*hope you’re doing good there. counting the days I believe…

*you had a bodyshop bag with you the other day? didnt notice it even if i did, i wouldnt know its environmental-friendly.

Pi Bani said...

Ahah! Found out about your affair with the MSM!!

Salt & Turmeric said...

seriouslah kerp. since sat, i just limit 5 max. so far so good. ;)

Aidan's Mama & Papa said...

i recycle even to price tags! how's that? over here, they make more incentives to recycle. all big plastic bottles, coke and mineral water bottles recycle dapat duit 30posen(euro)! just return them at any supermarkets.

lori sampah for papers comes every month to get our papers. they are all volunteers, and whatever amount they get out of the papers will be given to schools and help the needy. we seperate all our garbage. tins, bottles, papers, pastics,dried grass, leaves and plants! i am very very pleased with myself since we live here! besides, kat sini buang sampah kena bayar ikot berat.. haha!

kereta kalau berenti kat kedai ke mana, engines must be off. in certain parts of switzerland even when the traffic lights are red they must switch off their engines. it's the law.

kami naik basikal gi kedai dekat dekat. tak naik keta.

i wash my all our clothes using just 30c, not more.

the supermarkets here dont give out plastic bags. you have to buy them. so we bring our own bags everytime we do groceries

plastics are not the main cause of global warming etc (hardy can explain better)

best dok holland, cepat, who wants to move here!? tax 40% but the standard of living is good, they make everything easy for you (some, not all i should say!)

every difference make a difference. so, way to go!

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

kak Pi,

eh, mana ada...hehe...i couldnt be selling my soul could i? ok maybe i did...hush! hihi...

yo farina,

come on, you serious? i've been really looking forward for you to come back and lepak at mamak together. but you know lah, a teh tarik session without the essential item (fags!) is only quarter the fun. if you can hear me saying all this, you know i'm serious.

hey, hello there mr Aidan...

you have put me to shame you know that, little buddy? now everyone have better solution saving the earth than this old uncle.

with the weather over here in our country, riding a bicycle to long distance places is not recommendable as the heat can be lethal if one has a weak heart. but the government sure can emulate holland on how we could contribute in saving mother earth.

using recyclable bags should be seriously considered and produce less plastic bags.

tapi kalau nak ikut switzerland matikan enjin dekat traffic light alamatnya mesti kena maki.

thanks for crossing over. salam to mama and papa!

Tinesh said...

Dude, dont freak me out okay?? I wont stop smoking la..Happy? Dunhill fer liiiifeee!! haha

Kerp (Ph.D) said...


thats the spirit. you DA man. read what i said to Farina above.