As usual, I’ll be making my weekend hiatus, only this time it starts much earlier. In the mean time I will leave you guys with a video that some of you might enjoy it to bits.
This entry in a way, is specially dedicated to all you men who have been kind enough to frequently visit this humble blog.
Plus, I’ve got a point to prove, if you know what I mean.
muahahhaha...
Ok fellas, let's get down to it, grab your own mic and everybody all together now…
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
More about Kerp
Finally after a long absent it makes its round again and being a whore at it, it was only a matter of time before I am tagged. Thanks to Missy Constant Drama, the lady who passes the tag baton, now everybody will get to know me up-close and erotically personal. Ok maybe not that close but 15 random facts I’m required to reveal of myself, which can be pretty revealing too.
So here goes…
No 1. This has nothing to do with the latest move by a certain dumb state gomen but I’ve always wanted a federal Datukship. Not for the status but its monthly allowance.
No 2. I can wriggle both my ears but it never crossed me to join any freak shows nor political parties.
No 3. Contrary to popular belief, I only have 9 sexual fetishes instead of 10.
No 4. Once I spent a whole ill gotten RM150 on an Irish hat instead of food. I’m a Muslim!
No 5. I once killed a rabbit with a Thundercat sword.
No 6. I’ve never watched Titanic and am damn proud of it, man!.
No 7. I read one book per year because am already an accomplished smart ass.. S-m-r-t, smart!
No 8. Me was a closet Paul Gascoigne fan.
No 9. I can’t complete a day without a plate or 3 of plain rice.
No 10. Caught peeping once.
No 11. Trying to be less homophobic as possible.
No 12. During my earlier stage being a crippled dude, the sight of wheelchair disgusts me to bits.
No 13. I still have some soft spots reserved for Selangor football club.
No 14. I can still do this- *hand gesture*.
No 15. A big fan of Jackie Chan’s, which begs a question if he will ever conferred a Tan Sriship. He has after all, made more than one movie here.
There we have it. Any questions will not be entertained in public.
Now to pass it on-
Shah, you’re one. Cikgu nazir, Bala, you guys too. Farina, kak Pi, Anita akka, you’re it, ladies. Pak Zab, you’re it. Razlin, Dato Jaff, both It. DocTA, Jim Broga, Mad Salo, Elviza, all are it. Lim Kit Siang, you’re it. Khir Toyo, Husam Musa, it. Ir Nizar, Ali, Kayveas, it, it, it and it…fuck it, you’re all it.
So here goes…
No 1. This has nothing to do with the latest move by a certain dumb state gomen but I’ve always wanted a federal Datukship. Not for the status but its monthly allowance.
No 2. I can wriggle both my ears but it never crossed me to join any freak shows nor political parties.
No 3. Contrary to popular belief, I only have 9 sexual fetishes instead of 10.
No 4. Once I spent a whole ill gotten RM150 on an Irish hat instead of food. I’m a Muslim!
No 5. I once killed a rabbit with a Thundercat sword.
No 6. I’ve never watched Titanic and am damn proud of it, man!.
No 7. I read one book per year because am already an accomplished smart ass.. S-m-r-t, smart!
No 8. Me was a closet Paul Gascoigne fan.
No 9. I can’t complete a day without a plate or 3 of plain rice.
No 10. Caught peeping once.
No 11. Trying to be less homophobic as possible.
No 12. During my earlier stage being a crippled dude, the sight of wheelchair disgusts me to bits.
No 13. I still have some soft spots reserved for Selangor football club.
No 14. I can still do this- *hand gesture*.
No 15. A big fan of Jackie Chan’s, which begs a question if he will ever conferred a Tan Sriship. He has after all, made more than one movie here.
There we have it. Any questions will not be entertained in public.
Now to pass it on-
Shah, you’re one. Cikgu nazir, Bala, you guys too. Farina, kak Pi, Anita akka, you’re it, ladies. Pak Zab, you’re it. Razlin, Dato Jaff, both It. DocTA, Jim Broga, Mad Salo, Elviza, all are it. Lim Kit Siang, you’re it. Khir Toyo, Husam Musa, it. Ir Nizar, Ali, Kayveas, it, it, it and it…fuck it, you’re all it.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Reform
10 ways for a political party to redeem itself and make it more relevant and appealing to the masses, particularly today’s young generation.
1. Get rid of all the deadwoods. They’re a pest and a liability not just to the party, but the world population as a whole.
2. Prohibit a certain guy who is a known dumbass from contesting the number two post that could possibly pave way for him to take over the top seat. The last thing the youth needs is to gamble on the future by having a stupid asshole running the show.
3. Racist must be sacked immediately. Too many assholes will only dent the party’s credibility deeper.
4. Youth wing should do without old geezers at the helm.
5. See-through attire for the Puteris. A sure bet to appeal to the male (and some female) masses.
6. Pink trousers for the youth wing. If that does not attract much attention, I don’t know what will.
7. Rope in the real deal clowns. As the saying goes; leave it to the pros.
8. Money politics must go. 200 bucks is downright an insult unless…the bribery fetches up to rm10k per vote.
9. Treat all members like VIP. Everybody gets to cramp the exclusive room and join the orgy with their older counterparts. Sure more to sign up.
10. Give me a multi-million Ringgit project and I’ll reveal point number 10.
The weirdness is getting out of hand. In my mind I picture a gnome-like creature taking over the hot seat come March. But come to think of it, better goblins than a mere puppet.
1. Get rid of all the deadwoods. They’re a pest and a liability not just to the party, but the world population as a whole.
2. Prohibit a certain guy who is a known dumbass from contesting the number two post that could possibly pave way for him to take over the top seat. The last thing the youth needs is to gamble on the future by having a stupid asshole running the show.
3. Racist must be sacked immediately. Too many assholes will only dent the party’s credibility deeper.
4. Youth wing should do without old geezers at the helm.
5. See-through attire for the Puteris. A sure bet to appeal to the male (and some female) masses.
6. Pink trousers for the youth wing. If that does not attract much attention, I don’t know what will.
7. Rope in the real deal clowns. As the saying goes; leave it to the pros.
8. Money politics must go. 200 bucks is downright an insult unless…the bribery fetches up to rm10k per vote.
9. Treat all members like VIP. Everybody gets to cramp the exclusive room and join the orgy with their older counterparts. Sure more to sign up.
10. Give me a multi-million Ringgit project and I’ll reveal point number 10.
The weirdness is getting out of hand. In my mind I picture a gnome-like creature taking over the hot seat come March. But come to think of it, better goblins than a mere puppet.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Gardening part III
I don’t know about you folks but I’m very much still in festive mood. Since however, I have some issues with our cabinet ministers a.k.a the so-called VIPs that needs to be straightened out, I thought I’d take a break from the celebration, take a swipe at them and will be on my way again.
I have long accepted the fact I’m not a VIP. Which means if I had attended the PM’s annual open house do recently, I wont get to enjoy raya goodies in the comfort of VIP’s section that separates these bastards from the people.
And these are the same bunch claiming to be people’s leaders?
Come on tell me, why the need to have a special room for these lot, instead of mingling around, or queuing up for food for that matter just like hordes of attendees did that day?
To be quite honest, I personally couldn’t see the rationale behind this VIP room thing when the event was supposed to be one of the rare occasions when these fellas should instead mix around, rubbing shoulders with the people or simply sit next to an average joe for a meal or two.
I refuse to use the word commoner on us. That’d only make those fuckers feel more important than the crowd, who took the trouble enduring long queues just to catch a glimpse of our so-called big-shot leaders.
Well, get this; Fuck all cabinet ministers. Maaf zahir dan batin.
I have long accepted the fact I’m not a VIP. Which means if I had attended the PM’s annual open house do recently, I wont get to enjoy raya goodies in the comfort of VIP’s section that separates these bastards from the people.
And these are the same bunch claiming to be people’s leaders?
Come on tell me, why the need to have a special room for these lot, instead of mingling around, or queuing up for food for that matter just like hordes of attendees did that day?
To be quite honest, I personally couldn’t see the rationale behind this VIP room thing when the event was supposed to be one of the rare occasions when these fellas should instead mix around, rubbing shoulders with the people or simply sit next to an average joe for a meal or two.
I refuse to use the word commoner on us. That’d only make those fuckers feel more important than the crowd, who took the trouble enduring long queues just to catch a glimpse of our so-called big-shot leaders.
Well, get this; Fuck all cabinet ministers. Maaf zahir dan batin.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Gone Raya
Takbir bergema di pagi hari,
Indah suasana memecah sepi,
Kepada semua salam aidilfitri,
Ampun maaf ikhlas dari Kerp Ph D.
Kepada rakan2 semua, jika selama ini ada carutan, caci maki juga kata2 kesat yang hanya boleh ditemui didalam majalah porno telah mengguris hati dan menganggu minda anda yang bersih, ampun maaf dipinta ikhlas dari hati si penulis blog ini. Ia berkemunkinan besar tidak disengajakan dan jika ada yang terasa, ianya hanyalah kebetulan semata.
Thanks to all for sticking around, and for having to put up with all my crap through out this past year. My apologies if the reading materials here have not been up to your quality standard but rest assured, more craps coming your way.
Ok, lagi sekali…maaf zahir dan batin. Salam aidilfitri and happy holidays to my non-Muslim friends.
Indah suasana memecah sepi,
Kepada semua salam aidilfitri,
Ampun maaf ikhlas dari Kerp Ph D.
Kepada rakan2 semua, jika selama ini ada carutan, caci maki juga kata2 kesat yang hanya boleh ditemui didalam majalah porno telah mengguris hati dan menganggu minda anda yang bersih, ampun maaf dipinta ikhlas dari hati si penulis blog ini. Ia berkemunkinan besar tidak disengajakan dan jika ada yang terasa, ianya hanyalah kebetulan semata.
Thanks to all for sticking around, and for having to put up with all my crap through out this past year. My apologies if the reading materials here have not been up to your quality standard but rest assured, more craps coming your way.
Ok, lagi sekali…maaf zahir dan batin. Salam aidilfitri and happy holidays to my non-Muslim friends.
For obvious reason, this blog will take a long break, and will be back once the blog-owner is fully stuffed.
Friday, September 26, 2008
The ward
Maybe I’ve ran out of issue to swear at, or maybe it is just that annual thing when my mind is focussed solely on Syawal which is looming. Whatever it is, I have switched everything off to cherish every bit of the moment till at least the end of next week.
A visit to K9 spinal ward at HKL last night was never part of my plan but nonetheless, no better timing than the holy month of Ramadan to do some charity work by giving my bits back to society.
Ok, not exactly in monetary form because I needed that myself. Our presence was good enough to put some smile on their faces. A crack or two on lame political jokes did the trick for the much-needed icebreaker.
A trip down the ward has always been an eye-opener. Not that I have yet to come to terms with the gloomy ambience of the ward. It was the patient, some of who are friends from the earlier days that kinda moved me.
Going from one bed to another, suddenly you come to realise sitting on wheelchair isn’t about all things shitty.
And it has made me realise that one is never confined on wheelchair because for the very sole purpose, it makes us more mobile. Being bed-ridden however is a totally different circumstance all together. You are stuck. If its mere consolation, you are stuck with buddies who shares your pain.
I’m lucky in many aspects. Gone were the days when taking meals had to be done while lying on the stomach due to my busted ass. Nor the meals had to be finely blended to accommodate my digestive system.
I could go on and on.
That ward is one special place. It has played a very instrumental role in getting me where I am today. I may not be some big shot but as long I can give something back to someone who’s about to go through exactly what I’ve gone through many years ago, I think I deserve a Datukship for that.
A visit to K9 spinal ward at HKL last night was never part of my plan but nonetheless, no better timing than the holy month of Ramadan to do some charity work by giving my bits back to society.
Ok, not exactly in monetary form because I needed that myself. Our presence was good enough to put some smile on their faces. A crack or two on lame political jokes did the trick for the much-needed icebreaker.
A trip down the ward has always been an eye-opener. Not that I have yet to come to terms with the gloomy ambience of the ward. It was the patient, some of who are friends from the earlier days that kinda moved me.
Going from one bed to another, suddenly you come to realise sitting on wheelchair isn’t about all things shitty.
And it has made me realise that one is never confined on wheelchair because for the very sole purpose, it makes us more mobile. Being bed-ridden however is a totally different circumstance all together. You are stuck. If its mere consolation, you are stuck with buddies who shares your pain.
I’m lucky in many aspects. Gone were the days when taking meals had to be done while lying on the stomach due to my busted ass. Nor the meals had to be finely blended to accommodate my digestive system.
I could go on and on.
That ward is one special place. It has played a very instrumental role in getting me where I am today. I may not be some big shot but as long I can give something back to someone who’s about to go through exactly what I’ve gone through many years ago, I think I deserve a Datukship for that.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
An entry about gardening pt II
So Tun Dr Mahathir’s Chedet has reached a whopping 7 million hits last week. The fact that he only started to blog last May, that number of visitors thronging his website is simply impressive to say the least.
But I think pakdol can top his predecessor’s blogging achievement. If he had a blog, in no time will he get 22 million on his hit-counter…demanding him to resign!
Kahkahhh…
Ok that’s a lame one. I just need a breather before continuing with the shits I’ve been up to since last weekend. And I mean tons of it that I hope to get it all cleared up before the Raya week starts.
Then after that, its RAYA TIMEEEEEEEEE…
Burrp…oops…muahahaha…
But I think pakdol can top his predecessor’s blogging achievement. If he had a blog, in no time will he get 22 million on his hit-counter…demanding him to resign!
Kahkahhh…
Ok that’s a lame one. I just need a breather before continuing with the shits I’ve been up to since last weekend. And I mean tons of it that I hope to get it all cleared up before the Raya week starts.
Then after that, its RAYA TIMEEEEEEEEE…
Burrp…oops…muahahaha…
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